As this year comes to an end ........

         As the year 2010 is coming to end, I am thinking and thinking.... and no doubt this year has been one of the most eventful year in my life. some very happy moments as well as some sad moments which made me feel low like anything.I’m not going to make a list of everything wonderful or sad that happened, but I will say that
the people I met at my workplace (Sasaram) were so nice, the relationships I nurtured here at Patna, I feel really lucky.
Sometime I acted in an unbalanced manner, sometime it appeared that life is hell for me;I spent some time being sad and feeling guilty and feeling stupid and thinking i had made the wrong decisions, but as year passes by everthing started to go in my way. I just started feeling  happy and complete, and knowing i was doing they right thing…
And finally I did have some magic moments , simply unparalleled moments of my life... still echos of that make me ecstatic---- an experiance i never have in my life.
And fot that very reason year 2010 will be a special year for me...

Emotions in Life

        Life is like an 'unsolved' puzzle. No one can define what life is because it is a very complex thing.
It is something that makes you happy and proud at times and makes you feel so low at times that you say to yourself, "What hell is this life!"
        In Life, in every moment, something new happens; something that you never expected, something that you were waiting from a long while to happen and something you were expecting to happen. It is a combination of happiness, sorrow, joy, love, anger, enjoyment, loneliness, fear, excitement and many other emotions.
      The definition of the word life can't be completed without using the word emotions. Some people work in emotions whereas others work with emotions. So it's very important to understand how people are using their emotions. If they are letting emotions get control over them, then they'll be dragged by others and situations all the time.But, if he is controlling his emotions in a proper way, then no one will ever have control over him.
      That is why undrstanding EQ or Emotional Quotient is very important. I just try to control my emotions to a level where things or situations remains under my control. At the same time I believe that displaying emotions is very important in a person's life , simply because it allows others to understand you in proper perspective. However it is also important to know that where and in front of whom you are displaying your emotions. Some persons may misuse your emotions and exploit you. So it is always better to supress your real emotions in front of such persons.
     The way a person uses his emotions is what we call attitude. Someone has correctly said, "Your attitude determines your altitude in life".
      Attitude is the way an individual uses his emotions and directly related to the psyche of a person. Some people use their emotions in a positive way and some people do it in a negative sense.
      It's up to an individual to decide how he uses his emotions.But whatever it is, it is real fun.

Why some people are so mean ?

 At times I wonder how mean people can become to create problems for others when they find that all other methods to achieve their vested interests have failed.... That is really surprising that when things are settled now ,still they are trying to create obstacles. I know this is not the kind of problem which only I am facing. This world is full of glaring examples.People like treading on other people, they try to outwit you all the time, but are probably only really jelous of you.
 ऐसा कहा जाता है कि मनुष्य अपने सद्गुणों के लिए कम और दुर्गुणों के लिए ज्यादा जाना जाता है. शयद इसी लिए ऐसे लोग अक्सर चर्चा का केंद्र बिंदु होते हैं. वे हमें नुक्सान  पहुचाएं या नहीं , हम उनके बारे में सोंचने के लिए मजबूर हो जाते हैं क्योंक वे मौके कि तलाश में रहते हैं. इसलिए हमें सावधान रहना पड़ता है.
But the bigger question is how to tackle such persons? In my the best way is that you cannot expect every person to be kind and gentle , at the same time if you can see mean people just move on , its nothing to stay back and worry .And most important ,you  should not be mean and unfriendly ,

Happy days are back

It is said that Life is like a coin. Pleasure and Pain are the two sides. Only one side is visible at a time. But remember other side is also waiting for it's turn.  So perhaps for me it has just turned positive . After ordeal of more than two and half months , I am back again at my desired place of posting.



Happy days are here again
The skies above are clear again
So let's sing a song of cheer again
Happy days are here again

Altogether shout it now
There's no one
Who can doubt it now
So let's tell the world about it now
Happy days are here again

But I have also learnt a lot of lesson. So much mud slanging, so much dirty politics, so much back biting, unethical game but any how it gets managed and I am today able to show that decision of authority should remain intact with respect to me. At this moment of time, I MUST DECLARE IN UNEQUIVOCAL TERMS THAT I AM HIGHLY OBLIGED TO ALL MY FRIENDS WHO DURING THIS PERIOD OF CRISIS STOOD WITH ME.Without their support this task was simply impossible to achieve.

What's greater then mom's love?
Which pillow is better then Mom lap?
Which company's better then friends?
There are some things in life with no substitutes.
Love them forever.

Why I am sad ?

मन में सवाल बहुत सारे उठते हैं. कभी कभी मन एकदम शांत रहता है और कभी कभी अचानक बेचैन हो जाता है. आखिर क्यों. अगर मै एक समझदार और बुद्धिमान आदमी हूँ तो मैं अपने मन को क्यों नहीं समझा पाता हूँ की मै दुनिया में असंख्य लोगो से ज्यादा सुखी हूँ. भगवान ने मुझे जो दिया है उसमे संतुष्ट रहना चाहिए मुझे . पर शायद मनुष्य को कुछ conflict में रहने की आदत सी हो गई है. दिल और दिमाग में सामंजस्य बैठाने में शायद   इसीलिए मै असमर्थ रहता हूँ.
“You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel." So it pains when people raise a finger on my integrity and my honesty how can one say so/ What right anybody has got to  question my sincerity in any relationship. All my relationships are based on the foundation of mutual acceptance and in my life, yes, in my life till today I have not betrayed anyone with whom I have developed some kind of relationship. that is not my CHARACTER. I might commit some mistakes, I may hurt my loved ones but so far none,  has alleged that Rajiw has betrayed her/him. This I can say with confidence with respect to all with whom I have somekind of relationship. I am not ashamed of any of my relationships. I value all these.
अब अगर कोई character assisnation पर पिल पड़ा है तो मै क्या करू? मुझे दुःख तो बहुत होता है जब मेरे प्रिय के पास ही कोई तमाम तरह की उटपटांग बाते करे और उसके पास सुनने के सिवाई कोई चारा न रहे.
And what is more important is an alert is being sounded againist me . So ridiculous! Had I been working there, in that office, in that section , then may be there would havs been reasons for which people should be warned against my habits, my 'character'. Fact is that I rarely visit there, hardly once in a month. Then why anyone should try make people alert against me.
A perfect relationship is based on solid foundation of mutual underatanding and confidence. Anyone is free to walk out from a relationship anytime. Noone can thrust a relationship on anyone. So no need of any warning. This act is very silly and reflects some deep kind of mental problem that person is suffering.
But I find solace from the fact that  still many people understand me as a nice person.that give me strength to fight.
People say about me- "you are master in managing people"................. ooh................ whether it is complement or comment difficult to understand . Still what I feel is that I make people comfortable before me, simply because I just think, at least for a moment , their point from their angle. And secondly I project myself as a harmless yet cooperative person. that makes people to accept me more readly.

A Love Poem

It feels nice when someone misses u

feels good when someone loves u.
feels better when someone is with u.
But it feels the best when
someone never 4gets you...

Being yours is my basic necessity,
Missing you is my habit.
But forgetting you is like taking
my life out of me.


U make me realize that
You cannot fall in love
You can just rise in love.

Take my eyes but let me see you.
Take my mind but let me think about you.
But if you want to take my heart..
Its already with you.

When you love someone,
its like reaching for a star..
You know you cant reach
it, but u keep trying
Coz may be one day that star
just might fall for you.


Your smile is a beautiful as dew
Nothing is beautiful than it
Your love is as warm as fireplace

Nothing warmer than that
I just want to say I love you..
Till my life apart..


You are the reason of my breath
You are my creation my world..
Life can never be complete without
your love.

Ek Haadsa

सासाराम जाने के क्रम में दिनांक १२ जुलाई की घटना को भुलाना लगभग असंभव है. जिस टाटा सुमो से मै जा रहा था , पिरो से पहले उसने एक अधेड़ महिला को बीच सड़क पर धक्का मारा , बदकिस्मती से उस महिला की तत्काल उसी क्षण वँही पर मौत हो गई. अपने सामने वीभत्स मौत का नज़ारा मैंने पहली बार देखा . प्राण मुंह को आ गए. ऐसा लगा मानो सारी दुनिया यंही खत्म हो जाएगी . ड्राईवर ने जैसे तैसे गाडी को नियंत्रित किया. हम सभी यात्री चिल्लाए - भागो, भागो , और ड्राईवर गाडी लेकर भाग निकला. पीछे से लोगों का शोर सुने दिया. उस वक़्त हमें अपनी और ड्राईवर की सुरक्षा की चिंता थी. लेकिन मौत से ठीक पहले महिला के चेहरे की भाव भंगिमा , मन से निकलने का नाम ही नहीं ले रही थी.

The kind of emotions displayed on her face- the surprise, the fear, her desperate attemt to escape and finally her helplessness in front of a speeding vehicle, all made me really very sad. Not only sad but also I felt guilty of not doing anything to save her. Should I have forced driver to stop after the accident? But this might have led to lynching of driver by irate mob. I cursed my fate .
मै उस दिन न ठीक से खा सका और न ही रात में ठीक से सो सका. महिला का चेहरा हमेशा मेरे जेहन में कई दिनों तक घूमता रहा. हो सकता हो की उस महिला के बच्चे उसकी प्रतीक्षा कर रहे हो. एक माँ के बिना उनके जीवन की क्या दशा हो सकती है. वो किसी की पत्नी होगी, किसी की बेटी होगी, किसी की बहन होगी, यह भी हो सकता है की किसी के पालने पोषने की पूरी जिम्मेवारी उसी के कंधे पर हो. निश्चित तौर पर एक व्यक्ति के चले जाने के बाद पूरा परिवार विखर सकता है.

 Why sometime fate or bhagya becomes so bad for some people? Why without our own fault , really bad things happen to us? What is life? Why we take so much pain to shape up it when we know that it can end any day without warning, without notice ? Why we plan so much for future?

इस दुर्घटना के ठीक एक दिन बाद मै बीमार पड़ा. कहीं ऐसा तो नहीं की मृत महिला की आत्मा ने मुझे और अन्य यात्रियों को श्राप दिया हो ?उस दुर्घटना में मेरा कोई role नहीं था पर guilty feeling तो हो ही जाती है...................

There is something good in everyday

You wake up in the morning, open your eyes and possibly think, “I need coffee or Tea”. Afterwards you proceed to get ready for your day,  hustling and bustling trying to either get to work or whatever your agenda entails for that day. Somewhere in your subconscious mind, you have already seeded the thought for the day “today is a good day or a bad day”. At that moment, of that thought, your day begins…

Sometimes despite all your engagements , you feel alone. Most people despise being alone.However, there is a power in being able to find contentment in solitude, even if this is a forced one. In my opinion, a great deal of the pain caused by loneliness is due to a lack of control. Solitude is easy to enjoy when it isn’t forced. I think most people enjoy a few hours or even a few days to themselves if their regular lives are full of activity and meaningful people.

So when you lack control over your situation, solitude becomes loneliness. If you feel your isolation wasn’t chosen, and you can’t control it, that exile can be unbearable. The key, in my opinion, to reducing loneliness, is to regain some control.

 For me , the best way to enjoy solitude is by improving my inner world first. I may have had difficulties controlling my loneliness  from the outside, but I could control my inner world so that it would be more pleasant to live in isolation.

I quote what George Washington had said-It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company.


Of course we can and should keep our composure and happiness regardless of circumstances - regardless of our friends, family and co-workers - regardless of gossip, sarcasm, and negativity.

That is why, I believe “Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in everyday” and with this intention,I  want all my  friends to nurture this positive thought by sharing the smallest good thing that made them happy (even if it was for a while) for that day with me.

The Tater People

This world is full of Tater people. I am just giving some examples:


Some people never seem motivated to participate, but
Are just content to watch while others do the work.
They are called "Spec Taters".






Some people never do anything to help, but are gifted
At finding fault with the way others do the work.
They are called "Common Taters".




Some people are very bossy and like to tell others what
To do, but don't want to soil their own hands.
They are called "Dick Taters".




Some people are always looking to cause problems by
Asking others to agree with them. It is too hot or
Too cold, too sour or too sweet.
They are called "Agie Taters".



There are those who say they will help, but somehow
Just never get around to actually doing the promised help.
They are called "Hezza Taters".





Some people can put up a front and pretend to be
Someone they are not.
They are called "Emma Taters".






Then there are those who love others and do what they
Say they will. They are always prepared to stop whatever
They are doing and lend a helping hand. They bring real
Sunshine into the lives of others.
They are called "Sweet Taters".



Really some persons are lucky who are in company of Sweet Tater.

Visit to Birpur and Kosi Barrage

In last week of April , I got a chance to visit Birpur and Kosi Barrage. Birpur is a city and a notified area in Supaul district . It is a small town on the Indo-Nepal border near the historic Kosi Barrage on the Kosi River. A visit to this historic Barrage was really a fantastic experiance for me. you feel it , when you come across with fact that how Kosi has been tried to tamed at this point. Kosi - the "curse" of Bihar has only a couple of years ago played havoc with people of this area with unprecedented flood. In this visit some colleagues of our department were with me . Here are some photgraphs taken there:

                                                                       The Kosi Barrage

Kosi water as seen from Barrage

Me with sharma jee

Me alongwith colleagues

What is success- A poem

In first week of May , I got a chance to attend a workshop on "Leadership Styles" at Delhi. What a wonderful experiance! Really resource persons were so talented and so motivating that , I do not have doubt that world is full of good  and successful people. I am unfortunate if I do not get a chance to hear them or interact with them. I wish to write a lot on my experiance of this workshop, but at this moment this poem  written by Amanda Bradley entitled - What is Success?- which was presented before us :-

What is success?

Success is believing in all you can be,
in all that you dream and dare,
Taking time to help others
find their dreams as well,
being ready to give and to share...........

Success is enjoying
the pathways you have chosen
and feeling so glad to be you,
Helping others to feel
self fulfillment and joy and real pride
in whatever they do.........................

Success is discovering
new ways to reach higher
and reach out to those all around....
for only through caring
and helping and giving
can life's true successes be found !

 Really a motivating poem , I really like and love it.....

Some emerging thoughts

So this month is proving to be much more difficult than previous one. I was thinking about it, and actually that i have been so blessed over the last few years that i haven't really been faced with a lot of emotional things. I'm not sure how to describe it,
 Life changing really.

It's been tough.

But as i sit here and write this entry, I also have a calming feeling in my heart. I have learned a lot of valuable lessons this year.  Some, as collected by me, are as follow:

Love has nothing to do with looks, but everything to do with time, trust, and interest.

Laughing, crying, joy and anger… All are a vital. All make us human.

The greatest truths in life are uncovered with simple, steady awareness.

Bad things do happen to good people.

Uncertainty is caused by a lack of knowledge.

Time heals all wounds… regardless of how you feel right now.

Your health is your life.

Chance is a gift, so act on chance when given the opportunity.

Kindness and hard work will take you further than intelligence.

Carelessness is the root of failure

Purposely ignoring the obvious is like walking backwards toward the enemy.

Taking ownership of failure builds the foundation for success.


It is said that life happens in a blink of an eye, enjoy it, accept the hardships, embrace the joys, and feel every moment... its those feelings that are the sweet stuff of life. Because what is important in life is the LOVE and PEOPLE, and when these two converge.

Waiting for something to happen................

Oof...... I am writing a blog almost after a gap of Two months. Reason is that I am waiting and waitnig something to happen after a mess created by my headquarter and of course some too much engagement , some mental, some physcical............

 Still waiting .................... ah.............................

If pain has to come, may it come quickly. Because I have a life to live, and I need to live it in the best way possible. So why fate is playing a waiting game?

I just remember the great Eienstein who had  said:There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. I just think that really it is nothing sort of miracle that one day an order is issued and next day you are asked to wait. And this waiting is continued as if it will continue till the end of earth. So what should I think everything is miracle ?  The best way is to adjust and accept all these miracles thrust on you !

People aren't either wicked or noble. They're like chef's salads, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict.

Still the hope remains - The very least you can do in your life is figure out what you hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance, but live right in it, under its roof.
 So hope of working with loved one should never die .

Glimpses of Badminton Asia Championship

The Badminton Asia Championship organised at Delhi in the second week of April was more then successfull in many respect. In this tournament I got a chance to see top ranked badmintoton players of the world. No doubt it was a mesmerising event for me. here are some of the photographs taken by me during the tournaments. These have been taken from my camera and they certainly lack professional touch. But anyway I like all of these.

                                   Jwala Gutta and D Viju of India (Top seed in mixed double) in action

                               

Saina Nehwal in action

(Saina with her mother)

Some more action

Cultural Function on final day

Prize distribution

Me in action

Bihar Divas

विगत २२ से २४ मार्च २०१० तक बिहार दिवस का आयोजन अपने आप में अविस्मरनीय था. २२ मार्च १९१२ को बंगाल प्रेसिडेंसी से बिहार को अलग किया गया था. इस ऐतिहासिक घटना की याद में और बिहारियों में a sense of pride और belongingness विकसित करने के उद्देश्य से बिहार सरकार ने हर वर्ष २२ मार्च को बिहार दिवस समारोहपूर्वक मनाने का निर्णय लिया है. पिछले तीन दिनों तक इस सन्दर्भ में लोगो में जो उत्साह दिखा वो अदभुत था.मेरे ख्याल से हम बिहारी अपने आप को underestimate करते हैं और यह मानकर चलते हैं की हमारी अलग से कोई संस्कृति और पहचान नहीं है. साथ ही साथ कतिपय कारणों से बिहार के बारे में मिथ्या प्रचार भी बहुत हुआ है.


लेकिन अगर हम पिछले तीन दिनों में गाँधी मैदान में जो माहौल था उसपर अगर गौर करे तो यह स्पष्ट है की बहुत सारी भ्रांतियां अब दूर हो रही हैं . हजारों की संख्या में लोगो ने देर रात तक सांस्कृतिक कार्यक्रमों का आनंद उठाया , बिहार के इतिहास पर जो झांकी प्रदर्शित की गई थी वो कई मायनों में बेमिशाल थी. नई पीढ़ी कम से कम यह अच्छी तरह से समझ सकती है की बिहार का वर्तमान चाहे जैसा भी हो इसका अतीत गौरवशाली रहा है. क्या यह हमारे लिए गौरव की बात नहीं है की प्राचीन समय में पाटलिपुत्र दुनिया का सबसे समृद्ध राज्य था. नालंदा और विक्रमशिला जैसे विश्वविद्यालय थे , गौतम बुद्ध, भगवान महावीर, सम्राट अशोक , चन्द्रगुप्त, आर्यभट ऐसे नामों की लम्बी सूचि है जिनका जन्म और कर्म क्षेत्र बिहार रहा है.

 

 
इस अवसर पर आयोजित कार्यक्रमों में बिहार के दूरदराज़ से आये लोगो ,खासकर महिलाओं ,की भागीदारी भी महत्वपूर्ण थी. तलवारबाजी, धीमी साइकिल रेस जैसी प्रतियोगिताएं काफी लोकप्रिय रही.


 

 
बिहारी व्यंजन की बात अगर न हो तो शायद यह चर्चा अधूरी रह जायेगी. लाई, लिट्टी चोखा , चुरा दही, खाजा, जैसी बहुत चीजें हैं जो विशुद्ध रूप से बिहारी हैं. इन सबका आनंद भी लोगों ने खूब लिया.


इसमें कही कोई दो राय नहीं की बिहार और बिहारी की भी अपनी एक अलग positive पहचान है. यह भी सत्य है की बिहार की उपेक्षा भी अतीत में हुई है.

But there are enough reasons why we should feel proud of being bihari- The first republic of world, Gautam Buddha got enlightment, Chanakya, the great econmoist and political scientist, The Nalanda University, valmiki wrote ramayan here, Sushrut, the father of surgery, Bhagwan mahavir, Kamsutra of Vatsayana, Aryabhatt-the great astronomer----- the list is endless.

Frustrated ?

Recently I attended a meeting of Programme Officers in which our Senior most Officer of the zone also participated. Apart from normal official business, what I observed was that most of participants were frustrated from current state of affairs. The overall view was that we were not getting what we deserve and that we are being cheated by the organisation. The overall work atmosphere has deterioted too much and there is nothing left for us to work or get satisfaction from our work. Our officer gave all of us a patient hearing. (That is his biggest quality. He always gives a person complete chance to air his views openly and completely and he never out rightly reject his subordinate's opinion and even never question a person’s ability to do a work) He agreed with staffmembers views but asserted that we must think what is best for us in the current circumstances. If we become aloof and inert or if we react in an extraordinary manner then Department will justify its act of sidelining us.So we must introspect and try to develop positive attitude even in adverse situation. After all we are being paid handsomely in terms of pay. Many of us may not agree with his views and say that he is preaching because afterall he has already got post and place.

Later on I thought, thought and thought.(After all thinking is my passion). I try to understand what make us frustrated. Most of us are in our Forties and Fifties. This is a period where we are in a position to just look back in our life and evaluate what we have gained or lost in life. Secondly, during this period our Children are in an age where some crucial decisions may have to be taken regarding them. Our parents may be too old and sick. They also expect proper caring. So there is a lot of pressure.

So when we look back and see that we deserve more then what we have got from our life and again we find that our life in the organization has become stagnant, organisation has become a shelter place for jokers, hypocrites right from the top, then we feel being let down and finally frustrated. Sometime we call it Midlife crisis, when we start questioning the very purpose of our life. Midlife crisis involves wide range of feelings such as discontent with life and the lifestyle that may have provided happiness for many years, feeling cheated with people who have developed some kind of bond and have been really close to us, feeling adventurous and wanting to do something completely different and finally questioning the meaning of life.  This led to evaluating the validity of decisions made years before. These feelings at mid-life can occur naturally, or they can be brought on by external factors.


So what is the way out? Should we only cry, cry and cry or should we try to chart out a course to live life happily even in an adverse situation? The answer is obviously second one. This is the only way.

Some thoughts

     SOMETIME I TOO PLUNGE DEEP INTO THINKING MODE. Thinking, thinking and thinking. Sometimes it do happen that your attachment with a person made you too possessive. That is not fair. Sometime you fear something which is nonexistent. I think the best way is to cherish nice memories and ndonot think too much amything about future course of events in any relationship.
you made me smile
you motivated me towards so many matters
you brought out the best in me...

and  it is best for me to stay this way...

obscurely trying to 'see' you  from far
whispering thoughts of you to myself
wishing you well while you're out of sight

INTERNATIONAL WOMENS DAY GREETINGS

    International Women’s Day  is marked on the 8th of March every year. It is a major day of global celebration of women. The focus of the celebrations ranges from general celebration of respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women’s economic, political and social achievements.
   There is no doubt women have strongest influence on us. However, the "battle" of the sexes is as old as the hills. In patriarchal societies, women are conditioned to accept men as the superior sex. But awareness, education, and life's struggles have led women to shed their inhibitions. Great women leaders, artists, scientists, and other professional women have inspired other women to overcome social obstacles. However, the course of womens empowerment is not smooth and hassle free. Our society still remains heavley in favour of males. Look, what happened yesterday? A historic bill on womens reservation could not be passed in Rajyasabha. Reason? Was it due to resistence from some opposition members? NO, The fact is that ruling party failed to show the courage at crucial moment. There is undercurrent that large number of MPs from ruling party are against this. So I strongly feel that now only a miracle can save this bill.
  A society based on equal opportunity for both sexes is what we deserve. Unfortunately, even empowered and liberated girls and women are subjected to various kinds of injustice on the ground of gender. Many people still prefer a beautiful face over a beautiful brain. It will not be too much  if I say that for large number of men a beautiful woman's face is like chocolate, cash or cocaine . they feel happy to be in company of a beautiful face and never try to recognise that many times an ugly face may have beautiful brain. This kind of behaviour has led to a system wher a girl or woman try to display her beauty in order to get recognision. And that is real discrimination. We need a society where beauty of physcical body should become meaningless and merit should be only criteria for judging a girl or woman.

Until women and girls are liberated from exploitation and injustice, all our dream of  peace, security and  sustainable development stand in jeopardy.

 But we are living in 21st century. A lot has changed and I hope that sooner or later a society based truly on equal opportunity for both sexes will emerge. Happy womens day to all.

IT DOES NOT MATTER WHO YOU ARE

IT DOES NOT MATTER WHO YOU ARE

MAY BE YOU ARE  KING OF THE WORLD

MAY BE YOU ARE MOST DANGEROUS IN THE WORLD

MAY BE YOU ARE AN INDEPENDENT ONE

MAY BE YOU CAN RULE OTHER

EITHER YOU ARE A GENTLEMAN

OR MOST DANGEROUS KILLER OF THE WORLD

BUT THE FACT IS THAT

FOR A CUTE LAMB(BHED)  YOU(SHER) ARE LIKE THIS

Moral: SMALL CREATURE CAN ALSO DEVELOP POWER TO MELT THE HEART OF A MIGHTY ONE !

OUR BEHAVIOUR DURING HOLI

Bura na mano holi hai- That is the famous saying used frequently during holidays. People use to display unusual and many times unacceptable behaviour in the name of holi.I have noticed that during holi the difference between so called civilized and uncivilized people simply vanishes.People of highly "respectable' and "prestigious" section of socitey exhibit ANIMAL INSTINCT in an uninihibited manner. Within each and every human being, an animal-like instinct dwells. No matter how civil or well mannered one may live, deep inside lies a undercurrent to be released. If given the right situation or placed in the right environment, this innate, savage behaviour can overpower a person’s sense of common civil behaviour and turn an otherwise civil human being, into a 'savage animal'.Holi is such a occasion where people's behaviour makes me to again believe that this world is either 'MONEY CENTRIC" or "WOMAN CENTRIC". In an environment where you are free to talk anything without fear , these are the only two things people desire openly.What to talk about 'double meaning words' they go for 'single meaning words'.
This makes me to think that Human beings are still primarily a biological animal and it is only due to fear of society that they exhibit themslves to be a social animal.All living things have animals like instincts, humans just do a better job at repressing them. The fear of law is the reason for acting civilized, without it we aren’t too different then animals.HOLI IS THE PROOF !

Fear and Hatred

It has been told to me that fear and hatred both are inter related. I just wish to give a thought over it. In my view both fear and hatred are fuelled by our mind and are often cause of most of our miseries.They disturb creative force of our mind, corrupt our thinking process , finally leading to unhappiness and even suffering.
Fear drives us to acquire power, feeling that if we can dominate, we will be secure. But this kind of power can become perverse and is often due to our insecurities. The more powerful we become, the more we worry about someone else becoming powerful. The Cold War between America and the Soviet Union is a classic example of how fear drives towards madness.Fear leads only to an unending sense of insecurity, of not having enough, of not being 'the best'.
Many of our fears may appear less dramatic, but they may not be less destructive. Some people spend their entire life fearful that they will not meet someone else's standards. Even office gossip has its roots in fear. If we can make others look small, and by so doing make ourselves look better, we compensate for the fear of being unimportant.
Most of us think that if we were only richer, prettier, stronger, taller, slimmer-or if we had a better job, bigger car, bigger house, more friends, nice lovers, more respect -the adjectives are almost endless-then we wouldn't fear anything, and we would be happy.In my view that is not correct.
Often fear is not created by a lack of things, it is created by how we think. If you have the habit of worrying, it doesn't matter who you are, what you have, or what you do, you will worry because that is the habit of your mind. This useless habit is one of the biggest causes of unhappiness. And yet it has become so much a part of our life that we even think that fear is a natural part of human life.
And due to this we suffer from guilt, and find fault with ourselves, condemn ourselves for not living up to our own or someone else's expectations. That often leads to hatred towards someone or may even lead to self hatred. This self hatred particularly can be very dangerous in destructing a person's personality.
It has been said that"Hate is the consequence of fear; we fear something before we hate it". Hate is an emotion of intense revulsion and enmity for a person or a thing. The emotion of hate is a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action.And action due to fear and hate culminates into conflicts . When we are engaged in conflicts it leads to unnecessery stress and tension.But at the same time since you cannot control other persons behaviour, you have to face this hatred. This is unavoidable in todays world and we have to develop habit of living in situation full of hatred.
However,It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.It's a sign of your own worth sometimes if you are hated by some people.

A funny story

Sometime you have to find some unusual ways to get things done properly. I have just read a really funny story. I will like to share this:-

Online chat

One FRIEND WAS chatting with a female .
( both are software engineers by the way and both work for real big MNC’s )
Male : Hey…GM (Good Morning)… How’s u doing today?
Female : VGM…Day is going good and it got better having found u on chat
Male : wow…am honoured, u know what, my day starts only when I find you on Chat
Female : Yep…me too feel the same…Brb (be right back)’ll get some Coffee.
Male : OK
(Hero waits impatiently. Meanwhile, his manager comes to his seat.)
Manager : Hey, I need some help from you
Male : [**** This *** always comes at wrong time] Yeah tell me
Manager : Could u write a program for me which generates 'n'th prime number, Given value of n.Would you give this by today evening?
Male : I would do that, but I think it’s quite hard, is it ok with you, if I Give it by tomorrow evening.
Manager: Yeah, that would be fine. Thank you [Leaves the place]
(Our hero sighs and stares at his monitor waiting impatiently for Female to Arrive. All of a sudden smiles on his face. Over to chat window…)
Female : Hey, am back
Male : cool, you know what my manager does, She’s kinda….. keeps asking stupid Things,tries to give me stupid work
Female : Yeah, it’s the same everywhere. Real sick ppl these managers are!!
Male : Yep, u rite!!
Female : Hey, can u do me a favor?
Male : (smiles) sure, why not.
Female : Hey, I want you to write me a program to print 'n'th prime Number, given N. Would
you give that to me by tomorrow evening? Plzzz. You know it’s real Urgent for me to work this out
Male : hey, that’s a one-hour’s work. Sure check Ur mail in an hour from now. ok?
Female: THIS IS WHAT I ASKED U WHEN I CAME TO YOUR WORK PLACE. NOW YOU KNOW WHO I AM!!
AND ONE MORE POINT…. YOUR 1 HOUR TIME STARTS NOW!!

REALLY FUNNY !
MORAL : there is nothing wrong in exploring bizzare ways to get the work done.

Valentine day for me

We might have missed the deeper meaning of Valentine's day by singling out romantinc love as focus of this day's ultimate meaning. Love is multifaceted.It is much more, ya, much more then simply emotion.love is a force that can motivate,create,heal and transform the lives of anyone it touches. Many of us have forgotten that this day was created to recognise a saint.

We can see that the story of St. valentine represents many aspects of love.It was his love for God and his commitment to his values that made him to disobey the law.His respect for romantic love is also included in his disobedience.

SO what we should do on this day? in my view - being our own valentine, sharing meaningful and heartful appreciation to all the important persons in our life will be the ideal thing i.e. it should not be limited to our lover only, and finally recommiting to our spiritual values.

We will feel the real joy of life as we release the force of love into our life.

This may seem too simplistic, but love works.

A SPECIAL PERSON

What do we live for; if it is not to make life less difficult to each other?” sURE But unfortunately normally it does not happen. Most people, yes I repeat most people do make other persons life more difficult.This is particularly more true in certain places and organisations.
however there are some persons who are really special. they always do the useful thing, they say the courageous thing, they contemplate the beautiful thing: that is enough to make them something special.
T heyTrustworthy, empathetic, a good listener, honest, willing to uplift me when life gets me down.Consideration, humour, a sense of fun, understanding & empathy.and sometime not taking me too seriously as I can be too serious and need to lighten up !
What should be in a person to make him/her different
trustworthy- This is the core
Honest
Kind hearted
Devoid of jeolosy
forgiveness
Humour
Kindness and Warmth.
Loyalty (Steadfastness----Always there for you).
Open-mindedness.
Acceptance of who you are and your shortcomings.
Sincerity.
normally any man gets attracted towards a beautiful face.Beautiful faces can be seen anywhere But it is very rare that a HEART RESIDING IN A BEAUTIFUL BODY IS MUCH MORE BEATUIFUL.
TO HAVE A BEAUTIFUL FACE IS GODS WORK BUT TO DEVELOP A BEAUTIFUL HEART IS WORK OF SPECIAL PERSON ONLY.
AND ME LUCKY TO HAVE ONE.

Handling Relationship

Developing a relationship is one the most beautiful experience in a person’s life. However sometime, presumptions made on account of past behavior often have negative effect. I have often thought on this aspect a number of times. How we should handle a relationship. We need to ponder over this. Because stress suffered on account of dysfunctional relationships in our professional and personal lives can be a great impediment to our well being. Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something. They're trying to find someone who's going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take.
I think too much proximity breeds contempt is a fact as we all live and suffer through over bearing involvement with another individual’s life. Sometimes this suffocates a relationship.
Opposites attract is good reminder when we find ourselves drifting away in a relationship on account of differences of opinion and functional style. To have differences up to a level is a good and healthy thing but they should not go beyond comfort level.
It is also necessary to have regular and good communication . This should involve both speaking and listening, the later should be given much more attention.
Often commitments are made easier then kept. It is better to make fewer commitments but keep them to save the heart from burning.
Problems in relationship occur because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person.
It is always better to go for fresh approach in the middle of a conflict because that can be tonic of to tackle bitterness. It is true that all disagreements are results of misunderstanding someone else's level of consciousness