Why I am sad ?

मन में सवाल बहुत सारे उठते हैं. कभी कभी मन एकदम शांत रहता है और कभी कभी अचानक बेचैन हो जाता है. आखिर क्यों. अगर मै एक समझदार और बुद्धिमान आदमी हूँ तो मैं अपने मन को क्यों नहीं समझा पाता हूँ की मै दुनिया में असंख्य लोगो से ज्यादा सुखी हूँ. भगवान ने मुझे जो दिया है उसमे संतुष्ट रहना चाहिए मुझे . पर शायद मनुष्य को कुछ conflict में रहने की आदत सी हो गई है. दिल और दिमाग में सामंजस्य बैठाने में शायद   इसीलिए मै असमर्थ रहता हूँ.
“You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel." So it pains when people raise a finger on my integrity and my honesty how can one say so/ What right anybody has got to  question my sincerity in any relationship. All my relationships are based on the foundation of mutual acceptance and in my life, yes, in my life till today I have not betrayed anyone with whom I have developed some kind of relationship. that is not my CHARACTER. I might commit some mistakes, I may hurt my loved ones but so far none,  has alleged that Rajiw has betrayed her/him. This I can say with confidence with respect to all with whom I have somekind of relationship. I am not ashamed of any of my relationships. I value all these.
अब अगर कोई character assisnation पर पिल पड़ा है तो मै क्या करू? मुझे दुःख तो बहुत होता है जब मेरे प्रिय के पास ही कोई तमाम तरह की उटपटांग बाते करे और उसके पास सुनने के सिवाई कोई चारा न रहे.
And what is more important is an alert is being sounded againist me . So ridiculous! Had I been working there, in that office, in that section , then may be there would havs been reasons for which people should be warned against my habits, my 'character'. Fact is that I rarely visit there, hardly once in a month. Then why anyone should try make people alert against me.
A perfect relationship is based on solid foundation of mutual underatanding and confidence. Anyone is free to walk out from a relationship anytime. Noone can thrust a relationship on anyone. So no need of any warning. This act is very silly and reflects some deep kind of mental problem that person is suffering.
But I find solace from the fact that  still many people understand me as a nice person.that give me strength to fight.
People say about me- "you are master in managing people"................. ooh................ whether it is complement or comment difficult to understand . Still what I feel is that I make people comfortable before me, simply because I just think, at least for a moment , their point from their angle. And secondly I project myself as a harmless yet cooperative person. that makes people to accept me more readly.