आज शाम को दिल्ली के लिए निकलना है | जाने कि पूरी तैयारियां कर रहा हूँ पर मन में ख्यालों का बिचरना थमने का नाम नहीं ले रहा है | रिश्तों के बारे में क्या कहा जाए ? मेरी समझ से रिश्ते दर्पण की तरह हैं जिनमें हम अपने आप को देख सकते हैं जैसे कि अभी हम हैं। सम्बंधों से पलायन संभव ही नहीं है। यही संबंध एक दर्पण की तरह होते हैं जिनमें हम अपने आपको देख सकते हैं, हम यह खोज सकते हैं कि हम क्या हैं। इसी दर्पण में हम अपनी प्रतिक्रियाएं, पूर्वधारणाएं, गुस्सा, क्रोध, अपने भय, तनाव, क्षोभ, अकेलापन, शोक, दर्द और दुख को देखते हैं। सम्बंधों के दर्पण में ही हम देख सकते हैं कि हम प्यार करते हैं या प्यार नाम की कोई चीज है ही नहीं। हमें रिश्तों संबंधी प्रश्नों की जाँच करनी चाहिए क्योंकि यही प्रेम का आधार हैं।
प्रेम ऐसी चीज नहीं जिसके बारे में सोचा विचारा जाए, कृत्रिम रूप से उसे उगाया जाए, प्रेम की सुगंध ही उसका परिचय होता है।
जब आपके दिल को चोट पहुंचती है, उस बात को वहीं देख सुन कर खत्म कर देना चाहिए । उसे बोझ की तरह नहीं झेलना चाहिए | An intimate relationship is a particularly close relationship. It is a relationship in which the partiners trust one another very well. Loving is doing anything for that person, thinking about him/her constantly and being able to share your life events with that person. Liking somebody is just like, 'Okay, I like him because of this, this and this, but I don't know if I am ready to be in love with him'.All of us get discouraged from time to time and need a little encouragement and motivation. Sometimes we just need a little pat on the back. Sometimes we need an uplifting and inspiring book to get recharged or listen to a motivational talk to remind us how wonderful life can be and how great it is to be alive. The best place to get encouragement and motivation is from family and friends.
Wednesday 2 December 2009
Tuesday 1 December 2009
Friendship/Love is not a simple thing
दोस्ती या प्यार जो भी नाम दें यह संच है कि कुछ रिश्ते नायाब होते हैं और इसमें भी कोई दो राय नहीं कि रिश्तों में अपेक्छाओं का होना भी स्वाभाविक है | मन काफी दुखी होता है जब ऐसा नहीं हो पता है | जब कभी आपके इर्द गिर्द का पर्यावरण आपके मनोनुकूल होता है तो सब आपसे अछा वैव्हार करते हैं सब आपकी बड़ाई करते हैं , सब आपका गुणगान करते हैं, सब आपके पास आपके मनलायक बातें भी करते हैं, आपको लगता है सब कुछ बहुत अच्छा है, सब अच्छे हैं और सबके लिए आप अच्छे हैं | In order to run the show everybody just give you all the kinds of importance which you desrve or even desire. And you get a feeling of being in a position of power, doing all the things as per your conveniance. Nothing wrong in this as one should live in present and should enjoy life as it is available to him. But just a minute if the situation turns just unfavourable for you who remains beside you- only those persons who love you by heart, truly by heart. कभी ऐसा भी होता है जब हर कोई आपसे बात तक करने में सावधानी बरतने लगता है, लोग आपसे कन्नी काटने लगते हैं | आपको तंग करने के लिए साजिशें भी रची जाने लगती हैं और हर कोई सहानुभूति तो दर्शा सकता है पर उसके आगे शायद हीं वो कुछ करे | पर जो आपसे प्यार करते हैं वो तमाम बिपरीत परिस्थितिओं में भी आपके साथ रहते हैं, इस बात कि परवाह नहीं करते हैं कि आपके साथ के साहचर्य से लोग नाराज़ भी हो सकते हैं | ऐसे लोग दिल से आपके करीब होते हैं | यह आपका फ़र्ज़ है कि उनकी भावनाओं का ख्याल रखा जाए | भले ही ऐसी स्थिति में आपको कुछ अप्रिय स्थिति का सामना करना पड़े कुछ परेशानिओं का सामना करना पड़े | दिल के रिश्ते साधारण नहीं होते और न ही एक दो दिन में हर किसी के साथ बिकसित हो सकते हैं| If you cant spare some exclusive qualtiy time for your loved one then all the words are simply futile and meaningless. whatever may be the compulsion you are dutybound to act according to wishes of your "Friend". If you are not mentally prepared for this ,better a temporary pause button should be pressed in your relationship .
Monday 30 November 2009
Rare Personality
PERSONALITY is one of those SPECIAL things which cannot be compressed into a few words. When we think of certain individuals who have GREAT personality, we are at once made aware that no two personalities are alike . One impresses by charm n beauty, another by the sense of power, another by the grace of manner, another by the DEGREE of intellect, and still another by the sense of HUMANITY and finally another exhibiton of positive attitude.But no personality has all of these (?) that is what is normally said. But if you find a personality that combines all in one - what you will say? miracle- yahi na ! but miracles do happen and certainly I know one who combines all the above traits.
She is really beautiful and intellegent n intellectual and combines all the traits described above. her beauty is of different kind- stunning n awsome. She is a very friendly person who always keeps others happy.u can learn many things from her. U will come to know once u become closer to her, till then u will think she is so so ..but she is not. she takes everything coolly.
Personality, to be attractive, must have in it the element which makes it plain that the particular quality which creates it is not used against our fellowmen. We may admire a powerful personality, but if we feel that its power is used selfishly, we fear it while we admire it. We may admire a charming person, let us say a woman, but if we feel that the charm is a veil for faithlessness we dislike her, much though we admire the charm.
The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think. But i know she never display her beauty to her advantage. That makes her very very special.SHE IS a SWEET N CUTE FRIEND OF MINE
Your beautiful eyes stare right into my .. eyes
and sometimes i think of you late at night
I don't know why
She is really beautiful and intellegent n intellectual and combines all the traits described above. her beauty is of different kind- stunning n awsome. She is a very friendly person who always keeps others happy.u can learn many things from her. U will come to know once u become closer to her, till then u will think she is so so ..but she is not. she takes everything coolly.
Personality, to be attractive, must have in it the element which makes it plain that the particular quality which creates it is not used against our fellowmen. We may admire a powerful personality, but if we feel that its power is used selfishly, we fear it while we admire it. We may admire a charming person, let us say a woman, but if we feel that the charm is a veil for faithlessness we dislike her, much though we admire the charm.
The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think. But i know she never display her beauty to her advantage. That makes her very very special.SHE IS a SWEET N CUTE FRIEND OF MINE
Your beautiful eyes stare right into my .. eyes
and sometimes i think of you late at night
I don't know why
Monday 23 November 2009
Test Cricket - are they becoming boring ?
The recently concluded test match between India and Srilanka at Ahmedabad has once again ignited the debate about future of test cricket."Test Cricket is no longer favorite of crowds"- this view is now universally accepted.50-50 and 20-20 have replace it. Now if I say that TEST CRICKET IS PLAYED FOR RECORDS AND NOT FOR ENTERTAINING CROWD - it will not be wrong. Some traditonalists may disagree but I have many reasons to say that the Test Cricket is fast becoming obsolete and boring these days.
In comparision to ODIs and T20s there are not many spectators in the ground to watch the dull and lifeless proceedings of a test match. I often see players playing at their leisure, blocking each ball or leaving out the outswingers, which would have easily been despatch our of the ground by our own Shewag or Yousuf Pathan, if it were either ODI or T20. There is hardly any enthusiasm in the field either.
The players looked tired while changing sides. Just lethargy all round. Even the two batsmen in the middle hardly show any enthusiasm or interest. It appeared that they were playing not for the crowd but to cement their place in the side or for records. fanfare and enthusiasm are completely lacking in test matches.
In the past, People used to wait in que right from the middle of the night to get their tickets, some sleeping on the platform and some even used to bring blankets with them along with food. That was the craze or enthusiasm for the game. When the match started from the first day onwards the stadium would be full to the capacity for all the five days, barring a day break in-between.
When India and Pakistan played either in Lahore of Wankhede Stadium in Mumbai, there was jubiliation all over. It was a festive like atmosphere in both the countries. Everyone used to be concerned about the match whether he is a small boy or 80 years old man or woman. Such was the enthusiasm and importance attached to the Test Cricket those good olden days. Now today every thing has changed.
First it was the advent of One Day World Cup matches staged in England or Kerry Packers colour revolution that all brought changes to the game of cricket. But then, Test matches still continued to draw a huge crowd, as there were very few ODIs and more Test matches played.
Then the frequency of ODI matches brought new flavour to the entire game of cricket. The instant cricket or big hitting game produced many young cricketers who became instant heroes. The game became popular and drew more and more sponsors. The game was commercialised. From a dull Test match to a very vibrant game of ODI all changed the interest of the people. Test cricket started waning.
Then came another shortened form of game. It was T20 matches. It became still popular and drew the youth to the game. Never before opportunities wide opened for the upcoming cricketers. The young and old started enjoying this game. This shorteened form of game produced many heroes and people started identifying themselves with them. This sent Test cricket to the background further. The T20 World Cups and IPL all hastened the demise of the interest in Test cricket.
Those days, people had enough time to watch the game of Test Cricket. But then the changes in the very form of the game was responsible for making the game of Test cricket a dull and boring affair.
Notwithstanding the records made or broken, Test Cricket is at a crucial stage. It would be sooner than later, the Test Cricket would be slowly disbanded. There would be more ODIs and T20s than Test Cricket. After some time, even ODI would also loose its sheen giving way to abridged T20 form of game. It would not be a surprise or wonder, if this game is further reduced or shortened as T10 matches.
People cannot waste their time going to Test venues to watch a dull game for four or five days, notwithstanding the result it would produce or the performance of the individuals. But then enough is enough. It's time to say good-bye to Test Cricket. Sooner it is better for the game.
In comparision to ODIs and T20s there are not many spectators in the ground to watch the dull and lifeless proceedings of a test match. I often see players playing at their leisure, blocking each ball or leaving out the outswingers, which would have easily been despatch our of the ground by our own Shewag or Yousuf Pathan, if it were either ODI or T20. There is hardly any enthusiasm in the field either.
The players looked tired while changing sides. Just lethargy all round. Even the two batsmen in the middle hardly show any enthusiasm or interest. It appeared that they were playing not for the crowd but to cement their place in the side or for records. fanfare and enthusiasm are completely lacking in test matches.
In the past, People used to wait in que right from the middle of the night to get their tickets, some sleeping on the platform and some even used to bring blankets with them along with food. That was the craze or enthusiasm for the game. When the match started from the first day onwards the stadium would be full to the capacity for all the five days, barring a day break in-between.
When India and Pakistan played either in Lahore of Wankhede Stadium in Mumbai, there was jubiliation all over. It was a festive like atmosphere in both the countries. Everyone used to be concerned about the match whether he is a small boy or 80 years old man or woman. Such was the enthusiasm and importance attached to the Test Cricket those good olden days. Now today every thing has changed.
First it was the advent of One Day World Cup matches staged in England or Kerry Packers colour revolution that all brought changes to the game of cricket. But then, Test matches still continued to draw a huge crowd, as there were very few ODIs and more Test matches played.
Then the frequency of ODI matches brought new flavour to the entire game of cricket. The instant cricket or big hitting game produced many young cricketers who became instant heroes. The game became popular and drew more and more sponsors. The game was commercialised. From a dull Test match to a very vibrant game of ODI all changed the interest of the people. Test cricket started waning.
Then came another shortened form of game. It was T20 matches. It became still popular and drew the youth to the game. Never before opportunities wide opened for the upcoming cricketers. The young and old started enjoying this game. This shorteened form of game produced many heroes and people started identifying themselves with them. This sent Test cricket to the background further. The T20 World Cups and IPL all hastened the demise of the interest in Test cricket.
Those days, people had enough time to watch the game of Test Cricket. But then the changes in the very form of the game was responsible for making the game of Test cricket a dull and boring affair.
Notwithstanding the records made or broken, Test Cricket is at a crucial stage. It would be sooner than later, the Test Cricket would be slowly disbanded. There would be more ODIs and T20s than Test Cricket. After some time, even ODI would also loose its sheen giving way to abridged T20 form of game. It would not be a surprise or wonder, if this game is further reduced or shortened as T10 matches.
People cannot waste their time going to Test venues to watch a dull game for four or five days, notwithstanding the result it would produce or the performance of the individuals. But then enough is enough. It's time to say good-bye to Test Cricket. Sooner it is better for the game.
Thursday 19 November 2009
Mind taking a break and relationship
Resuming blogging after a short break... Brain cells tire out thinking a lot of topics and weighing the advantages of one topic against the other! So they badly needed a break!
After a long long time, I'm having something that I never had for years - a blank mind. Absolutely deprived of any thoughts, any purpose and any confusions...
Some kind of thought always occupies my mind - be it philosophy, spirituality, family, relationships, self analysis, work, career, something... something has always been there. I always had something to say... something to share.. But now a days I do feel that my mind is a bit blank, devoid of any serious thinking..
Sometimes the confusing problems come back to the mind, and I become further frustrated. Thinking about something else for a while relieves the mind from the pressures of the problems.
When I say thinking about something relieves me, it only means the beautiful relationship which I have developed. I know that thinking about this makes me cool , n calm. I just think about this relationship and I feel that ecerything is fine for me , that this relationship reiterates that I have lost nothing , that so much good things are waiting for me. so no doubt I am lucky having such a perfect friend.
It is not easy to develop perfect relationship. In my view relationship can be lifelasting only when both partners know the weakness of each other and are even ready for a fight on issues they differ. Such "fighting" only strenghtens their bonding of friendship.
Many relationships fail because one person tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their partner will change the bad habits . It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character. Thus, having high expectation will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..
"Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One"
After a long long time, I'm having something that I never had for years - a blank mind. Absolutely deprived of any thoughts, any purpose and any confusions...
Some kind of thought always occupies my mind - be it philosophy, spirituality, family, relationships, self analysis, work, career, something... something has always been there. I always had something to say... something to share.. But now a days I do feel that my mind is a bit blank, devoid of any serious thinking..
Sometimes the confusing problems come back to the mind, and I become further frustrated. Thinking about something else for a while relieves the mind from the pressures of the problems.
When I say thinking about something relieves me, it only means the beautiful relationship which I have developed. I know that thinking about this makes me cool , n calm. I just think about this relationship and I feel that ecerything is fine for me , that this relationship reiterates that I have lost nothing , that so much good things are waiting for me. so no doubt I am lucky having such a perfect friend.
It is not easy to develop perfect relationship. In my view relationship can be lifelasting only when both partners know the weakness of each other and are even ready for a fight on issues they differ. Such "fighting" only strenghtens their bonding of friendship.
Many relationships fail because one person tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their partner will change the bad habits . It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character. Thus, having high expectation will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..
"Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One"
Sunday 15 November 2009
Life Moments
EVERY MOMENTS OF LIFE SHOULD BE ENJOYED- This has become mantra of the day. In my view "enjoying" life is a new concept perhaps borrowed from west. If we look at our own culture, we will find that more importance has been given to live life in a disciplined and dignified manner then to simply explore the ways for enjoyment. as per Hindu mythology the human life is also seen as four Ashramas .They are Brahmacharya, Grihasthya, Vanaprastha and Sanyasa. The first quarter of one's life, brahmacharya is spent in celibate, sober and pure contemplation of life's secrets under a Guru, building up body and mind for the responsibilities of life. Grihastya is the householder's stage, in which one marries and satisfies kama and artha within a married life and professional career. Vanaprastha is gradual detachment from the material world, ostensibly giving over duties to one's sons and daughters, and making holy pilgrimages. Finally, in sanyasa, the individual goes off into seclusion, to find God through meditation and peacefully shed the body for the next life. But that is mythology - no longer valid in todays technolgy driven world. there is nothing wrong if we desire pleasure in our life.
But if some things make life pleasant, others make it miserable.Every day of our lives are filled with miracles large or small. Also, every day of our lives will find work, hardship and pain.This is life. Some days are joyful while others bring on tears of sadness.we should embrace each day with humility.We should make up your mind to be happy. Find pleasure in simple things. What I mean that we should not always strive for enjoying the life but should always try to do something meaningful in life.
Often we are fearful of criticism. But the fact is you can’t please everyone. So don’t let your critics run and ruin your life. The more you accomplish, the more resistance you will meet. Don’t borrow trouble. Imaginary problems are heavier than actual ones.
There are many ways we can make our life meaningful like:
Avoid people who make you unhappy.
Don’t hold postmortems– over your mistakes.
Do what you can for those less fortunate than you;
especially for those who have blessed your life
Keep busy. A busy person doesn’t have time to be very unhappy.
One should be strong enough to face this world everyday with confidence.At the sametime one should know his/her weakness so that they can make them strong enough to handle their problems. One should be willing to share his/her joys with their loved ones as by sharing these small moments the happiness get doubles.
And above all one should love the person who loves him/her and should give other the same respect
Work hard for those things you want in life....then take pride in your accomplishments and thank God for His help.
If you are unhappy, look inside yourself because that is where you will find true happiness. You may not be able to change circumstances but you CAN control how you handle them.
Be content with who you are and what you have but always strive for more.
Be clean.....of mind....heart......soul.....and body of course.
This is the way can really LIVE LIVELY every moments of life. And this is the real enjoyment!
But if some things make life pleasant, others make it miserable.Every day of our lives are filled with miracles large or small. Also, every day of our lives will find work, hardship and pain.This is life. Some days are joyful while others bring on tears of sadness.we should embrace each day with humility.We should make up your mind to be happy. Find pleasure in simple things. What I mean that we should not always strive for enjoying the life but should always try to do something meaningful in life.
Often we are fearful of criticism. But the fact is you can’t please everyone. So don’t let your critics run and ruin your life. The more you accomplish, the more resistance you will meet. Don’t borrow trouble. Imaginary problems are heavier than actual ones.
There are many ways we can make our life meaningful like:
Avoid people who make you unhappy.
Don’t hold postmortems– over your mistakes.
Do what you can for those less fortunate than you;
especially for those who have blessed your life
Keep busy. A busy person doesn’t have time to be very unhappy.
One should be strong enough to face this world everyday with confidence.At the sametime one should know his/her weakness so that they can make them strong enough to handle their problems. One should be willing to share his/her joys with their loved ones as by sharing these small moments the happiness get doubles.
And above all one should love the person who loves him/her and should give other the same respect
Work hard for those things you want in life....then take pride in your accomplishments and thank God for His help.
If you are unhappy, look inside yourself because that is where you will find true happiness. You may not be able to change circumstances but you CAN control how you handle them.
Be content with who you are and what you have but always strive for more.
Be clean.....of mind....heart......soul.....and body of course.
This is the way can really LIVE LIVELY every moments of life. And this is the real enjoyment!
Friday 6 November 2009
Anger n love
While a man was polshing his new car , his four year old son picked a stone and scratched lines on the side of car . In anger , the man took the child's hand & hit it many times , not realizing he was using a wrench .
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures . When the child saw his father with painful eyes he asked 'dad when will be my fingers grow back ? That man was so hurt & speechless. He went back to the car and kicked it many times . Devastated by his own actions sitting the front of the car he looked at the scratches and realised that child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD ' Next day that man commited suicide.
Anger and Love has no limits .......always remember that things are to be used & people are to be loved . But the problem is in today's world is that ,people are being used & things are loved ................
It is said that for every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. sometime anger can really damage you horrible .
तो क्या हमें एकबार अपने दिल से नहीं सोंचना चाहिए कि क्रोध हमेशा नुकसान ही पहुंचता है और साथ ही साथ रिश्तों को हमें हमेशा मजबूत करना चाहिए. जब मै सासाराम में रहता हूँ तो इसपर अक्सर चिंतन और मनन करता रहता हूँ
Now just one more:
girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)
Girl: Slow down. Im scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me.
In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building
because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only
one survived.
The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his
breaks broke, but he didn't want the girl know about it . Instead, he had her say she loved him, but felt her hug one last time, then he gave his
helmet to her so she would live even though it meant he would die.
if u r really loving someone frm ur heart.....
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures . When the child saw his father with painful eyes he asked 'dad when will be my fingers grow back ? That man was so hurt & speechless. He went back to the car and kicked it many times . Devastated by his own actions sitting the front of the car he looked at the scratches and realised that child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD ' Next day that man commited suicide.
Anger and Love has no limits .......always remember that things are to be used & people are to be loved . But the problem is in today's world is that ,people are being used & things are loved ................
It is said that for every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. sometime anger can really damage you horrible .
तो क्या हमें एकबार अपने दिल से नहीं सोंचना चाहिए कि क्रोध हमेशा नुकसान ही पहुंचता है और साथ ही साथ रिश्तों को हमें हमेशा मजबूत करना चाहिए. जब मै सासाराम में रहता हूँ तो इसपर अक्सर चिंतन और मनन करता रहता हूँ
Now just one more:
girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)
Girl: Slow down. Im scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me.
In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building
because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only
one survived.
The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his
breaks broke, but he didn't want the girl know about it . Instead, he had her say she loved him, but felt her hug one last time, then he gave his
helmet to her so she would live even though it meant he would die.
if u r really loving someone frm ur heart.....
Saturday 24 October 2009
Controlloing Emotions
Last nite i saw the ' Big Boss' programme on TV and the interview with KRK was really very interesting. He has been driven out of big boss house due to his violent behavior. AB rightly said that it is very important for us to control our emotions, particularly negative ones. Display of such emotions made us to loose everything. Emotions like Anger, Fear, Guilt, Depression, Resentment, Bitterness, Disappointment, Discouragement, not listening to others view, trying to force your view on others , all are really detrimental to a persons growth.
It is a fact that thousands of years ago we were threatened by wild animals who wanted to eat us. Now we more often feel threatened by other human beings, either psychologically or physically. And due to this we develop such emotions. Among these emotions anger is a very intense emotion. It can be used either in productive or counter-productive ways. It can lengthen or shorten our lives. It is like electricity. It is known that we feel strongly about something. As with every emotion, it has a lesson for us. It can help us become more aware of what we feel strongly about and which emotional needs are important to us. Sometimes we become angry after being provoked. But even in such situation, anger may not be always useful. Sometimes it may frightened your “enemy” but prolong expression of anger may even lead to serious health problems.
Some times we feel alone, lonely, rejected, discouraged, uninspired, used, abused, unproductive, misunderstood, etc. Together, all of these feelings drain our energy, kill our motivation, leading to development of depression. Irony is that depression do not led us to anywhere , in fact make things more complicated. In such situations we should take recourse to meditation and also support of our friends n loved ones including family members.
Lifetime relationships teach us lifetime lessons, our job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what we have learned to use in other areas of our life. For this we must build a solid emotional foundation.
It is a fact that thousands of years ago we were threatened by wild animals who wanted to eat us. Now we more often feel threatened by other human beings, either psychologically or physically. And due to this we develop such emotions. Among these emotions anger is a very intense emotion. It can be used either in productive or counter-productive ways. It can lengthen or shorten our lives. It is like electricity. It is known that we feel strongly about something. As with every emotion, it has a lesson for us. It can help us become more aware of what we feel strongly about and which emotional needs are important to us. Sometimes we become angry after being provoked. But even in such situation, anger may not be always useful. Sometimes it may frightened your “enemy” but prolong expression of anger may even lead to serious health problems.
Some times we feel alone, lonely, rejected, discouraged, uninspired, used, abused, unproductive, misunderstood, etc. Together, all of these feelings drain our energy, kill our motivation, leading to development of depression. Irony is that depression do not led us to anywhere , in fact make things more complicated. In such situations we should take recourse to meditation and also support of our friends n loved ones including family members.
Lifetime relationships teach us lifetime lessons, our job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what we have learned to use in other areas of our life. For this we must build a solid emotional foundation.
Friday 16 October 2009
Is Diwali for everyone?
Crores of Indians in the country and abroad are celebrating the festival of light, Diwali , this Saturday.It's the time of the year for the near and dearones to come together to rejoice and exchange gifts and sweets to mark this festival which commemorates the victory of good over evil. Diwali symbolizes the victory of light over darkness. Celebrated joyously all over the country, it is also a festival of wealth and prosperity.
But is it true that Diwali creates sparkle in everyone's life? NO, rightly No, when we are competing with neighnours in having more decoration , more crackers etc, we fail that some of our "neighbours" are still struggling for food. For them Diwali or no diwali , day remains the same.
Last week I just read an interview with A NRI CEO who is heading brook bond brand of tea in England. He rightly pointed out that with exception of TATA , business houses in India are doing little towards social sector in comparision to their western counterparts. He said that TATAs are their competitor in business but inspiration in social sector.he is planning charity work on a big scale soon in India.
Now the bigger question is - how should rich behave in a poor country?
Last week two newsitems are noteworthy:four Indian CEOs made it to the Forbes list of 10 wealthiest CEOs of the world and second one: naxals in Jharkhand beheaded a Police officers and some 200 naxals attacked Police station in Jharkhand. These two events should make us to think something beyond normal. It is a fact that almost half of India lives on less then 40 Rs a day!
One of our cabinet minister has suggested that CEOs should not take 'vulgar' salary. True many rich Indians indeed believe in vulgar display of wealth and arrogance during festival times and also during marriage time.And when poor are no more content with their Godgiven poorness they resort to violence in form of naxals.
Growing eliticism is not good for this country. It is duty of riches of this country to empower the poors by creating space for their growth. They should part with their fortune for this purpose.Meagre charity will not work. What needed is empowerment work on a large scale.
Otherwise 'India' and 'Bharat' will remain on collision path.
But is it true that Diwali creates sparkle in everyone's life? NO, rightly No, when we are competing with neighnours in having more decoration , more crackers etc, we fail that some of our "neighbours" are still struggling for food. For them Diwali or no diwali , day remains the same.
Last week I just read an interview with A NRI CEO who is heading brook bond brand of tea in England. He rightly pointed out that with exception of TATA , business houses in India are doing little towards social sector in comparision to their western counterparts. He said that TATAs are their competitor in business but inspiration in social sector.he is planning charity work on a big scale soon in India.
Now the bigger question is - how should rich behave in a poor country?
Last week two newsitems are noteworthy:four Indian CEOs made it to the Forbes list of 10 wealthiest CEOs of the world and second one: naxals in Jharkhand beheaded a Police officers and some 200 naxals attacked Police station in Jharkhand. These two events should make us to think something beyond normal. It is a fact that almost half of India lives on less then 40 Rs a day!
One of our cabinet minister has suggested that CEOs should not take 'vulgar' salary. True many rich Indians indeed believe in vulgar display of wealth and arrogance during festival times and also during marriage time.And when poor are no more content with their Godgiven poorness they resort to violence in form of naxals.
Growing eliticism is not good for this country. It is duty of riches of this country to empower the poors by creating space for their growth. They should part with their fortune for this purpose.Meagre charity will not work. What needed is empowerment work on a large scale.
Otherwise 'India' and 'Bharat' will remain on collision path.
Sunday 11 October 2009
Working with passion
Follow your passion, and success will follow you - that's a very nice saying. And i do believe that it is only passion which makes you emotive. Emotive towards your work, emotive towards a person or a situation. it is not that I donot associate passion with my new place of posting,. I never mean that that place is not GOOD. that would be humiliating for persons living there. When you work with passion,you exhibit high energy and the ability to put 100 % focus on moving something forward no matter what the obstacles are. Even this energy is contagious and most of us are attracted towards this.
What I feel is that working environment there does not make me excited and so working with passion is difficult there.I just wanted to keep the momentum of my work going , which unfortunately has come to a standstill.I really do need to pursue my dreams instead of just being willing to accept any kind of thing in this organisation.That do make development of some negative feelings.
I know that the magic about working with passion is that it usually only takes a small belief in yourself to start making things happen.Everytime on the eve of my visit to that place I think that What is one small step I could take to move myself forward and begin working with passion tomorrow?
and what are the obstacles standing in my way?
There I am one man army.but ath sametime it is also said that one person with passion is better than forty people merely interested.That makes me to think that as of now I have no option but to work with passion in my job. I do need help of my loved one to keep me going.
What I feel is that working environment there does not make me excited and so working with passion is difficult there.I just wanted to keep the momentum of my work going , which unfortunately has come to a standstill.I really do need to pursue my dreams instead of just being willing to accept any kind of thing in this organisation.That do make development of some negative feelings.
I know that the magic about working with passion is that it usually only takes a small belief in yourself to start making things happen.Everytime on the eve of my visit to that place I think that What is one small step I could take to move myself forward and begin working with passion tomorrow?
and what are the obstacles standing in my way?
There I am one man army.but ath sametime it is also said that one person with passion is better than forty people merely interested.That makes me to think that as of now I have no option but to work with passion in my job. I do need help of my loved one to keep me going.
Friday 9 October 2009
Household works by husband
Once you get married, you become a complete man and you have a better half in the name of your spouse. Traditionaly, as they start their family life, it is the duty of wife alone to take care of entire household works including rearing and caring of children.At the same time, after the marriage according to the employment status and position of a spouse his or her role in the family varies. Suppose if the husband is employed and his spouse is a house wife, their role in the family gets divided - Husband by virtue of his employment earns for the family, his wife in the role of a house wife attends to the house hold duties like cooking , cleaning, washing and other house works. Their roles are clear cut and well defined.
In the modern days, since the economic burden is more pinching than any other burden, it has become customary to seek an employed girl as spouse. After getting married, since both spouses are employed, some problems do appear with respect to sharing household work.Many men use their higher income as an excuse not to do housework. They claim that because they make more money, they should be excluded from household chores.Men frequently claim they are too tired or stressed to help after spending long hours at the office. They need to relax when they get home, not to start preparing dinner or mingling with the children.Often, men will simply say they don’t know how to do housework to escape doing it. Well, many of them genuinely don’t know how but that’s only because they are too lazy to learn it.Although it do appear unfair but this has been a practice in our societies.
Last few days ,I faced a situation where I have to almost single handedly manage all the household works alone. I honestly admit it is really very difficult to set house in order, prepare children for school, arranging for their food after they return from school, bathing them etc.But at the same time it is very satisfying too. I feel that even if a wife is not working,she works just as hard at home, if not more. While the husband works eight hours a day, she works 24 hours. So it isn’t fair for her to do everything at home.
Life is not one way traffic. Once you get married, you become a complete man and you have a better half in the name of your spouse.if both of you are employed, your sharing of housework with your spouse is a must and according to the nature of your work, availability of time, proximity of your offices etc should be taken into account.At the same time there should not be any hard n fast rule.Honest realisation of situation is only required.
I remember a study in which wives were asked, which kind of husband they would prefer- a husband who would “make the bed” or a husband who would “perform better in bed". Surprisingly majority preferred the first one!
In the modern days, since the economic burden is more pinching than any other burden, it has become customary to seek an employed girl as spouse. After getting married, since both spouses are employed, some problems do appear with respect to sharing household work.Many men use their higher income as an excuse not to do housework. They claim that because they make more money, they should be excluded from household chores.Men frequently claim they are too tired or stressed to help after spending long hours at the office. They need to relax when they get home, not to start preparing dinner or mingling with the children.Often, men will simply say they don’t know how to do housework to escape doing it. Well, many of them genuinely don’t know how but that’s only because they are too lazy to learn it.Although it do appear unfair but this has been a practice in our societies.
Last few days ,I faced a situation where I have to almost single handedly manage all the household works alone. I honestly admit it is really very difficult to set house in order, prepare children for school, arranging for their food after they return from school, bathing them etc.But at the same time it is very satisfying too. I feel that even if a wife is not working,she works just as hard at home, if not more. While the husband works eight hours a day, she works 24 hours. So it isn’t fair for her to do everything at home.
Life is not one way traffic. Once you get married, you become a complete man and you have a better half in the name of your spouse.if both of you are employed, your sharing of housework with your spouse is a must and according to the nature of your work, availability of time, proximity of your offices etc should be taken into account.At the same time there should not be any hard n fast rule.Honest realisation of situation is only required.
I remember a study in which wives were asked, which kind of husband they would prefer- a husband who would “make the bed” or a husband who would “perform better in bed". Surprisingly majority preferred the first one!
Tuesday 6 October 2009
Your heart is my pinata
"your heart is my pinata" - a quotation used by American novelist and satirist Chuck Palahniuk. pinata means - A decorated container filled with candy and toys suspended from a height, intended to be broken by blindfolded children with sticks, and used as part of Christmas and birthday celebrations in certain Latin-American countries .Pinatas are fabulous creations, enjoyed the world over for their festive presence and promise of fun. These party decorations, made from brightly colored tissue and crepe paper, are popular attractions at children's birthday celebrations. In addition to their visual attraction, the pinata's popularity is heightened by the candies and toys hidden inside.
when i say your heart is my pinata, it means that your heart is a decoration for me , it is full of joy n fun. I can play with it the way I like. It includes a bit of shaking it in form of teasing etc. So you should take it easy and not get annoyed. I never ever intented to hurt you,rather intention is to tease you for getting some kind of fun. So do not explain. It is useless. No explanation ever explains the necessity of making one.
so any comment from me made from point of teasing you should be taken in right spirit.
I want to be very close to someone I respect and admire and have somebody who feels the same way about me.
I laugh, I love, I hope, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too, So we're really not that different, me and you.
when i say your heart is my pinata, it means that your heart is a decoration for me , it is full of joy n fun. I can play with it the way I like. It includes a bit of shaking it in form of teasing etc. So you should take it easy and not get annoyed. I never ever intented to hurt you,rather intention is to tease you for getting some kind of fun. So do not explain. It is useless. No explanation ever explains the necessity of making one.
so any comment from me made from point of teasing you should be taken in right spirit.
I want to be very close to someone I respect and admire and have somebody who feels the same way about me.
I laugh, I love, I hope, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too, So we're really not that different, me and you.
Monday 5 October 2009
can money buys happiness
Many of us feel very happy when we get some xtra money in form of arrear payment, bonus, honrarium etc. It is generally believed that money can make you happy. How much this is true? For example- As a general rule, the higher the price of a hotel room the cleaner the room. If you pay more u will get more cleaner room, gud ambience and naturally it will make you happy. at the same time less money more problm in a hotel room which may even irritate you , what to talk about happiness.
However I will like to be more broad and say that this is not ultimate happiness. - Money can buy happiness, but only if you spend it on someone else.Spending as little as Rs 10 a day on someone else could significantly boost happiness. It will make you happy to your inner core and after sometime you will be able to see world in radically different way.
Even then this not all , to be happy is very complex thing. Sometime very little things can snatch your happiness, and sometimes even big achievements donot lead to happiness. Recently I read a beautiful piece on various aspects of happiness. Let me put some points from this.
Happiness begins with understanding that we are multi-dimensional creatures operating on four distinct levels: physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual. When all four dimensions are working in harmony it is much easier to achieve a state of inner peace.
These 4 Dimensions are equal in importance but impact our lives in very different ways. Learning the purpose and qualities of each helps you understand yourself and others more clearly and gives you insight into how you can improve your happiness quotient.
Physical Dimension
Health – Play – Pleasure
Tune in to how your body feels when you’re happy.
This dimension helps us experience life through our senses, body and the energy around us. When we nurture our physical being we are better able to deal with health issues, body image, stress and various stages of life like child-rearing, career building, midlife and retirement.
Intellectual Dimension
Reason- Logic-Performance
Practice quieting your mind each day, focusing on the moment
This dimension rules our minds and allows us to reason, apply logic, appreciate precision, quality and performance. It also allows us to learn, accumulate knowledge, make rational decisions and bring order to our lives. All of this is good, but many of us spend too much time in our intellectual being. Thinking about work, planning or thinking about the past and the future can overwhelm us. When this happens it’s hard to appreciate the moment and we miss many opportunities to experience happiness through our other dimensions.
Emotional Dimension
Relationships – Self Image
Notice how you feel when you focus on the positive.
Probably the most challenging of the dimensions, this heartland governs our relationship with ourselves and others. A healthy emotional dimension allows us to be self-assured, confident and understanding of others’ emotions. It also helps us establish and maintain fulfilling relationships. Too often we dwell on negative emotions and this causes us to block out all the good we can receive from the other dimensions.
Spiritual Dimension
Beliefs-Concepts-Creativity
Allow nature, beauty and creativity to be an everyday part of your life.
While most people think of spiritual as meaning religious, in dimensional terms it refers to our conceptual selves. It governs our belief systems and inspires creativity and passion. When our spiritual dimension is given its due, we see the world outside ourselves more clearly, open up to creative expression and access the positive characteristics of the other dimensions more easily.
life is truly priceless. One should take care of all the above dimensions and happiness will be at your doors.
However I will like to be more broad and say that this is not ultimate happiness. - Money can buy happiness, but only if you spend it on someone else.Spending as little as Rs 10 a day on someone else could significantly boost happiness. It will make you happy to your inner core and after sometime you will be able to see world in radically different way.
Even then this not all , to be happy is very complex thing. Sometime very little things can snatch your happiness, and sometimes even big achievements donot lead to happiness. Recently I read a beautiful piece on various aspects of happiness. Let me put some points from this.
Happiness begins with understanding that we are multi-dimensional creatures operating on four distinct levels: physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual. When all four dimensions are working in harmony it is much easier to achieve a state of inner peace.
These 4 Dimensions are equal in importance but impact our lives in very different ways. Learning the purpose and qualities of each helps you understand yourself and others more clearly and gives you insight into how you can improve your happiness quotient.
Physical Dimension
Health – Play – Pleasure
Tune in to how your body feels when you’re happy.
This dimension helps us experience life through our senses, body and the energy around us. When we nurture our physical being we are better able to deal with health issues, body image, stress and various stages of life like child-rearing, career building, midlife and retirement.
Intellectual Dimension
Reason- Logic-Performance
Practice quieting your mind each day, focusing on the moment
This dimension rules our minds and allows us to reason, apply logic, appreciate precision, quality and performance. It also allows us to learn, accumulate knowledge, make rational decisions and bring order to our lives. All of this is good, but many of us spend too much time in our intellectual being. Thinking about work, planning or thinking about the past and the future can overwhelm us. When this happens it’s hard to appreciate the moment and we miss many opportunities to experience happiness through our other dimensions.
Emotional Dimension
Relationships – Self Image
Notice how you feel when you focus on the positive.
Probably the most challenging of the dimensions, this heartland governs our relationship with ourselves and others. A healthy emotional dimension allows us to be self-assured, confident and understanding of others’ emotions. It also helps us establish and maintain fulfilling relationships. Too often we dwell on negative emotions and this causes us to block out all the good we can receive from the other dimensions.
Spiritual Dimension
Beliefs-Concepts-Creativity
Allow nature, beauty and creativity to be an everyday part of your life.
While most people think of spiritual as meaning religious, in dimensional terms it refers to our conceptual selves. It governs our belief systems and inspires creativity and passion. When our spiritual dimension is given its due, we see the world outside ourselves more clearly, open up to creative expression and access the positive characteristics of the other dimensions more easily.
life is truly priceless. One should take care of all the above dimensions and happiness will be at your doors.
Friday 2 October 2009
What Gandhism means to me
Today is Mahatma's birth anniversery. This is a day when I never forget to just think over the relevence of gandhian ideals in todays world in general and also in my personal life.
Gandhi is certainly as relevant if not more for the country today. His vision for the country and his dreams for the community as a whole still hold good for India. He taught us that irrespective of obstacles you encounter, you should pursue the goals you have set. His ideals reflect true values of humanity and encourages to participate in tasks that would promote the greater good of society at large.
If we just look back to days when Gandhi was pursuing his aim thru non violence means, we can conclude it was a different world.One has to be reminded that in those days there was much less communication and hardly any knowledge of what was going on in far corners of the world. The sympathy of impartial outsiders uninvolved in the local issues was not easy to come by – since they did not know about the local issues till months,. Knowledge of government repression or police brutality – if they were known at all – by virtue of some daring reporter's exposé of government's actions, was way in the future. That is why in the Third World countries, the governments still try to control the media; and, for example, in the case of numbers of persons killed in a police shooting, they report much less than the actual numbers.
This made the task of communication far more difficult in those days. Gandhi had to garner sympathy from local inhabitants on the opposite side by his dignified moral actions, wherever he protested the brutal actions of inhuman regimes. Time and again he commanded and got the pledge of total non-violence from his followers in the face of extreme provocation and brutality. In the process, when non-violent protesters marched to protest some government action and the police acted against them by resorting to a baton charge or shooting, the local solidarity and sympathy of opponents tended to lie on the side of the non-violent protestors. And, thus, minimal physical harm resulted.
This lowering of hurdles led to larger mass participation in subsequent non-violent reactions to each police action or repressive regulation. It was both brilliant and effective tactics in those days of isolation, when sympathy had to be earned from among the local partisans of the opposition.
sadly we are missing these methods in any agitation these days and the cruel fact is that through violent methods some kind of success is also being tried to achieve, notwithstanding the fact that such achievement are no achievement and in fact they lead to more unrest and pain to human beings.
Although I have been great admirer of gandhi right from my childhood, it is only last year I was involved in a project on Gandhi. During this process I had a bit of nervousness with respect to quality n timely completion of project, even i had some kind of quarrel, wrangle and arguments with my colleague. Even a fall out with my project partner seemed possible. But as we moved on project, we got passionate with project and ultimately a beautiful programme was produced. I got a feeling of Gandhian philosophy which made me more considerate , caring, selfless and understanding. Today I have best kind of luv n friendship with my project partner. Such is the power of Gandhi. If you honestly try to understand him , he will make desirable changes in you.
what I also learned is that what you do , do it with passion n determination.Whether you are an ordinary person or a celebrity, you can do without passion only if you can do without life because it is passion alone that determines the extent to which you are alive.
Salute to this greatest MAN of 20th Century.
Gandhi is certainly as relevant if not more for the country today. His vision for the country and his dreams for the community as a whole still hold good for India. He taught us that irrespective of obstacles you encounter, you should pursue the goals you have set. His ideals reflect true values of humanity and encourages to participate in tasks that would promote the greater good of society at large.
If we just look back to days when Gandhi was pursuing his aim thru non violence means, we can conclude it was a different world.One has to be reminded that in those days there was much less communication and hardly any knowledge of what was going on in far corners of the world. The sympathy of impartial outsiders uninvolved in the local issues was not easy to come by – since they did not know about the local issues till months,. Knowledge of government repression or police brutality – if they were known at all – by virtue of some daring reporter's exposé of government's actions, was way in the future. That is why in the Third World countries, the governments still try to control the media; and, for example, in the case of numbers of persons killed in a police shooting, they report much less than the actual numbers.
This made the task of communication far more difficult in those days. Gandhi had to garner sympathy from local inhabitants on the opposite side by his dignified moral actions, wherever he protested the brutal actions of inhuman regimes. Time and again he commanded and got the pledge of total non-violence from his followers in the face of extreme provocation and brutality. In the process, when non-violent protesters marched to protest some government action and the police acted against them by resorting to a baton charge or shooting, the local solidarity and sympathy of opponents tended to lie on the side of the non-violent protestors. And, thus, minimal physical harm resulted.
This lowering of hurdles led to larger mass participation in subsequent non-violent reactions to each police action or repressive regulation. It was both brilliant and effective tactics in those days of isolation, when sympathy had to be earned from among the local partisans of the opposition.
sadly we are missing these methods in any agitation these days and the cruel fact is that through violent methods some kind of success is also being tried to achieve, notwithstanding the fact that such achievement are no achievement and in fact they lead to more unrest and pain to human beings.
Although I have been great admirer of gandhi right from my childhood, it is only last year I was involved in a project on Gandhi. During this process I had a bit of nervousness with respect to quality n timely completion of project, even i had some kind of quarrel, wrangle and arguments with my colleague. Even a fall out with my project partner seemed possible. But as we moved on project, we got passionate with project and ultimately a beautiful programme was produced. I got a feeling of Gandhian philosophy which made me more considerate , caring, selfless and understanding. Today I have best kind of luv n friendship with my project partner. Such is the power of Gandhi. If you honestly try to understand him , he will make desirable changes in you.
what I also learned is that what you do , do it with passion n determination.Whether you are an ordinary person or a celebrity, you can do without passion only if you can do without life because it is passion alone that determines the extent to which you are alive.
Salute to this greatest MAN of 20th Century.
Sunday 20 September 2009
The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure
There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout:
This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complete package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.
When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.This is what called as - The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.! There are no failures - just experiences and your reactions to them.
However sometimes I believe that Fear of failure is a minor barrier compared to lack of resources and lack of motivation to work hard enough to gain that success. Any reaction ?
This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complete package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.
When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.This is what called as - The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.! There are no failures - just experiences and your reactions to them.
However sometimes I believe that Fear of failure is a minor barrier compared to lack of resources and lack of motivation to work hard enough to gain that success. Any reaction ?
Wednesday 9 September 2009
Managing Self
Management = Manage + men + T(technolgy). so it is clear that in management we manage people and Technlolgy. Everyone is talking management now a days. Its importance is increasing day by day. All of us try to manage people at home, at office , at meeting places or practically everywhere. What we miss is that while attempting to manage others , we fail to manage self. We all want to be seen as competent and likable. But sometimes we forget to take care of ourselves and are in danger of maintaining that very image.We are responsible for everything that happens in our life. We should learn to accept total responsibility for ourself. If we do not manage ourself, then we are letting others have control of our Iife.
The prerequisites for successful self management are:
1. Health (this is most important - anything comesafter this)
2. Appearance ( Confident outlook in appearance is must )
3. Knowledge (Nothing new to write about its importance)
4. Attitude (Positive attitude even at worst time)
5. Skill
a. Communiaction skill
b. Presentation skill
c. Leading n Motivating skill
d. Time management skill
e. Creative skill
ALL THE ABOVE SKILLS CAN BE DEVELOPED WITH PROPER PRACTICE, GUIDENCE N PATIENCE. If we acquire all the above attributes, we will be successfull manager without any doubt.
Some additional tips:
+ Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.
+ If you catch yourself worrying about an upcoming task, go ahead and do it now so it no longer is a distraction.
+ Get into the habit of finishing what you start.
+ Give up "waiting time" forever. Have something with you at all times to work on. For example: plan your day, work on a report, or read a page from your book
+ Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.
+ Avoid worry. The majority of the things you worry about never occur.
+ Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.
+ Take a chance-calculated risks pay off .
+ Frequently ask, "Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?"
+ Plan the future, but live in the present.
And finally FIRST PRACTICE THEN PREACH, if you wish to manage others.
The prerequisites for successful self management are:
1. Health (this is most important - anything comesafter this)
2. Appearance ( Confident outlook in appearance is must )
3. Knowledge (Nothing new to write about its importance)
4. Attitude (Positive attitude even at worst time)
5. Skill
a. Communiaction skill
b. Presentation skill
c. Leading n Motivating skill
d. Time management skill
e. Creative skill
ALL THE ABOVE SKILLS CAN BE DEVELOPED WITH PROPER PRACTICE, GUIDENCE N PATIENCE. If we acquire all the above attributes, we will be successfull manager without any doubt.
Some additional tips:
+ Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.
+ If you catch yourself worrying about an upcoming task, go ahead and do it now so it no longer is a distraction.
+ Get into the habit of finishing what you start.
+ Give up "waiting time" forever. Have something with you at all times to work on. For example: plan your day, work on a report, or read a page from your book
+ Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.
+ Avoid worry. The majority of the things you worry about never occur.
+ Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.
+ Take a chance-calculated risks pay off .
+ Frequently ask, "Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?"
+ Plan the future, but live in the present.
And finally FIRST PRACTICE THEN PREACH, if you wish to manage others.
Saturday 5 September 2009
Eyes are Windows to the Soul
I have just read a beautifull novel - Kite Runner - by Khaleed Housseni. In this novel a character named Ali has facial paralysis due to which he cannot move his any facial muscles leading to absence of any kind of facial expression. Even his voice has distorted to a level that he cannot express emotions in his voice. But still through his eyes, yes only through his eyes, he was able to exhibit his feelings and emotions. This is really soul touching. And so it has been rightly said that " EYES ARE WINDOWS TO THE SOUL"
Eyes are windows to the soul, because they express so much that we can see inside of a person through watching his/her eyes. When a baby is born, one of the first things she recognizes and enjoys focusing on is the human face! Part of what is so compelling is the eyes.
See if you can express an emotion through your eyes without moving any other part of your face! Which moveable parts are the most expressive? What is expressed when nothing moves on your face?
We wear masks every day as we relate to people we meet. We may not always want everyone to know our true feelings, or we may not even know them ourselves! One of the ways that we keep our inner selves hidden is through the contradiction of what our faces are saying and what our bodies are saying. But here again Eyes never lie !
Through your facial expression you may hide your real emotions but if I look deep inside your eyes , I know what you are feeling. Whether you are a bit uneasy, a bit tense , very happy but trying to conceal yr happiness publicly so and so.......
I was once a bit terrible mess. I never paid much attention to her at all. It is only after a incident which unsettled me that I just give a full good look at her eyes. I found them so kind full of love for me. All the pains which I was going through, her eyes said - I share your pain - This was enough for me to cool myself.
Her eyes radiate a kind of calm n happiness even in adverse time ! Her eyes always look for good in me.
A friend is someone who knows the song of your heart and who can sing it for you when you have forgotten it. Thanx for being like that.
Eyes are windows to the soul, because they express so much that we can see inside of a person through watching his/her eyes. When a baby is born, one of the first things she recognizes and enjoys focusing on is the human face! Part of what is so compelling is the eyes.
See if you can express an emotion through your eyes without moving any other part of your face! Which moveable parts are the most expressive? What is expressed when nothing moves on your face?
We wear masks every day as we relate to people we meet. We may not always want everyone to know our true feelings, or we may not even know them ourselves! One of the ways that we keep our inner selves hidden is through the contradiction of what our faces are saying and what our bodies are saying. But here again Eyes never lie !
Through your facial expression you may hide your real emotions but if I look deep inside your eyes , I know what you are feeling. Whether you are a bit uneasy, a bit tense , very happy but trying to conceal yr happiness publicly so and so.......
I was once a bit terrible mess. I never paid much attention to her at all. It is only after a incident which unsettled me that I just give a full good look at her eyes. I found them so kind full of love for me. All the pains which I was going through, her eyes said - I share your pain - This was enough for me to cool myself.
Her eyes radiate a kind of calm n happiness even in adverse time ! Her eyes always look for good in me.
A friend is someone who knows the song of your heart and who can sing it for you when you have forgotten it. Thanx for being like that.
Sunday 16 August 2009
How to be happy in difficult situation
It is a wellknown fact that situation in a person's life keep on changing and that facing a difficult situation is simply part of your life. We want to change or get out of such situation at the earliest.People are normally negative and pessimistic by nature.We usually tend to come down on the side of negativity , bad feelings, anger and sadness. Moreover if you are in loving relationship then you expect some extra support from your partner and if the support is not up to your expextation, you feel more sad and some times depressed.
if this is the situation, it means that this is not a mature and mutually loving and giving relationship. When you feel like that and if you want to be happy in life you should stop for a while and develop some self-confidence in your own life. If a person is not happy alone he will not be happy in company with other person. A person must be happily independent before he can create a healthy and mutually loving relationship. Relationship should only add to an already happy life. When people are not very confident and happy in their own lives they look to others and better circumstances to make them happy and it never works. Then they become resentful and angry about it because they expected the other person to solve their own unhappiness, and end up miserable anyway.
People aren't taught to be happy. We aren't raised that way. Parents raise us to be responsible, to get a job, and to take care of ourself, but does that include happiness? We do the best we can. Unfortunately, it is very difficult to know whether people are truly happy or putting on a good show. You cannot look at someone's exterior and know what's going on inside. Are they living true to themselves, or are they living a lie of some sort?
I or anyone donot feel to be happy all the time . Why?
1.Somehow I have accepted my place last on the list of importance in my life. I seem to matter less than everyone else. I spend my time attempting to make everyone else happy and have never considered my own happiness.
2.I cannot say "no" to any request. I don't know how to stand up for myself and I hate the idea of confrontation. I cannot stand to not be liked so I go out of my way for people to like me. I am a good girl or boy and do as I am told. This isn't always happy, I don't feel like people really respect me, but it's a huge boost for my self-esteem .
3.I avoid things that need to be said or done. Either I deny the unhappiness in my life or I know it's there but refuse to address it.
4.Someone else is to blame for my unhappiness. It's not my fault. I refuse to accept responsibility for my life and, in so doing, I give my power to some entity outside myself to control how I feel inside. Being a victim keeps me powerless.
There are, of course, many other barriers to success and happiness. If you are not comfortable with feeling good, then you will avoid it. Unless you are consciously seeking a new experience, as a creature of habit, you will automatically do things the way you've always done them and you will want to feel the way that is most familiar and known to you, even if it doesn't feel good.
so the best way is:
Give yourself permission to be happy and to feel good, to be successful . That is the first step to change. Give yourself permission to go after what feels good for you. Take a life inventory and assess where you are right now and where, perhaps you are not so happy. Be rigorously honest with yourself because awareness is the power you need to make a difference. Happiness is created by eliminating the things that get in the way as much as it is by doing what you love. And often what needs to be eliminated is the junk that goes on in our heads. Happiness is really an inside job. Happiness comes with an untroubled inner world. Learn to align your mind and happiness will come easier and will be sustainable.
if this is the situation, it means that this is not a mature and mutually loving and giving relationship. When you feel like that and if you want to be happy in life you should stop for a while and develop some self-confidence in your own life. If a person is not happy alone he will not be happy in company with other person. A person must be happily independent before he can create a healthy and mutually loving relationship. Relationship should only add to an already happy life. When people are not very confident and happy in their own lives they look to others and better circumstances to make them happy and it never works. Then they become resentful and angry about it because they expected the other person to solve their own unhappiness, and end up miserable anyway.
People aren't taught to be happy. We aren't raised that way. Parents raise us to be responsible, to get a job, and to take care of ourself, but does that include happiness? We do the best we can. Unfortunately, it is very difficult to know whether people are truly happy or putting on a good show. You cannot look at someone's exterior and know what's going on inside. Are they living true to themselves, or are they living a lie of some sort?
I or anyone donot feel to be happy all the time . Why?
1.Somehow I have accepted my place last on the list of importance in my life. I seem to matter less than everyone else. I spend my time attempting to make everyone else happy and have never considered my own happiness.
2.I cannot say "no" to any request. I don't know how to stand up for myself and I hate the idea of confrontation. I cannot stand to not be liked so I go out of my way for people to like me. I am a good girl or boy and do as I am told. This isn't always happy, I don't feel like people really respect me, but it's a huge boost for my self-esteem .
3.I avoid things that need to be said or done. Either I deny the unhappiness in my life or I know it's there but refuse to address it.
4.Someone else is to blame for my unhappiness. It's not my fault. I refuse to accept responsibility for my life and, in so doing, I give my power to some entity outside myself to control how I feel inside. Being a victim keeps me powerless.
There are, of course, many other barriers to success and happiness. If you are not comfortable with feeling good, then you will avoid it. Unless you are consciously seeking a new experience, as a creature of habit, you will automatically do things the way you've always done them and you will want to feel the way that is most familiar and known to you, even if it doesn't feel good.
so the best way is:
Give yourself permission to be happy and to feel good, to be successful . That is the first step to change. Give yourself permission to go after what feels good for you. Take a life inventory and assess where you are right now and where, perhaps you are not so happy. Be rigorously honest with yourself because awareness is the power you need to make a difference. Happiness is created by eliminating the things that get in the way as much as it is by doing what you love. And often what needs to be eliminated is the junk that goes on in our heads. Happiness is really an inside job. Happiness comes with an untroubled inner world. Learn to align your mind and happiness will come easier and will be sustainable.
Wednesday 12 August 2009
Time Management
Most of people often complain that they fail to fulfil their commitment due to lack of time. That is really shocking because everyone knows that we have been given 24 hour cycle and our life have to be adjusted into this and not vice versa. So it is really important to work smart then just to work hard.Only hard work may or may not give you desired result but smart work, it is gurrented. Let me quote from a article read just a few days ago- Ensure that you will be working smart, not just hard. Donot go fishing at the bathtub. Donot try to work up lather in a running stream.Instead, fish in a stream and work up lather in a bathtub. Set and evaluate your goals, estimate the quantum and quality of efforts to be invested in attaining the goals. Calculate the ROI(Return on investment)quotient carefully and then, and if you are convinced that the ratio is satisfactory, go ahead and work towards your goals. that is smart work and intelligent effort.
We have many desires and targets. We donot always gets what we want. Some of us are happy with what we get and others remain dissatisfied. Still others donot give up.Now the question is which approach is right one?
In a wider perspective, let us see in this way. You can have a desire. Put in your best effort to fulfil it. But make sure you enjoy the effort rather then its fruits. There are those who make the effort grumbling and are happy only when the desired is achieved. There are others who exhaust themselves making the effort to such a degree that they have no strength or enthusiam left to enjoy the fruit. The best way is however , enjoy the effort no matter what the effect.
It is always better to celebrate the march towards destination. If the destination is reached , we will be happy. If not, nobody can take away the sense of thrill at having run the race!Happiness should be derived not from reaching a goal but from strugle of attempt at reaching this goal. For example, playing cricket is one kind of joy, winning is another kind. So even if you lose the game no one can snatch from you the joy of playing the game. So one should enjoy the travel, enjoy the endeavour no matter what the result is.
so the bottem line is - ENJOY THE EFFORT NO MATTER WHAT THE EFFECT
We have many desires and targets. We donot always gets what we want. Some of us are happy with what we get and others remain dissatisfied. Still others donot give up.Now the question is which approach is right one?
In a wider perspective, let us see in this way. You can have a desire. Put in your best effort to fulfil it. But make sure you enjoy the effort rather then its fruits. There are those who make the effort grumbling and are happy only when the desired is achieved. There are others who exhaust themselves making the effort to such a degree that they have no strength or enthusiam left to enjoy the fruit. The best way is however , enjoy the effort no matter what the effect.
It is always better to celebrate the march towards destination. If the destination is reached , we will be happy. If not, nobody can take away the sense of thrill at having run the race!Happiness should be derived not from reaching a goal but from strugle of attempt at reaching this goal. For example, playing cricket is one kind of joy, winning is another kind. So even if you lose the game no one can snatch from you the joy of playing the game. So one should enjoy the travel, enjoy the endeavour no matter what the result is.
so the bottem line is - ENJOY THE EFFORT NO MATTER WHAT THE EFFECT
Monday 10 August 2009
Shades of Friendship
We all have friends. People have tendency to divide friends into true , good and best friends. That is not unnatural because among friends we really develop some kind of extra intimacy with some one and rightly he/she is termed as true /best friend. And rest remains good friends. But to say that some friends are bad or even worst is not fair.Friendship is a pious word and you can not associate it for someone who is bad/worst for you. A friend may develop some bad habits , even he may become really bad in terms of social parameters, yet he may remain your friend, if his attitude remains the same for you.A bad person can be your good friend and at the same time a bad 'friend' can be a good person. that is what we say Interpersonal relationship. The moment a friend behaves in unfriendly manner / deceives you, he ceases to be your friend. He then becomes bad or worst person only. He at the most can be a nonfriend of you. A nonfriend does not deserve friendly treatment, he deserve proper courtsey and manner. A person can be your neighbour, your colleague , your co worker, your supervisor, your boss , your subordinate,your copassenger etc , they all deserve respect, courtsey and disciplined behaviour from you. Friendly behaviour should be reserved for friends only.Mutual trust is cornerstone of friendship. so one should be careful in choosing a friend.
Everyone wants a true friend, and many of us believe that we have a friend who can be called a true friend. What kind of relations do friends share? When can we call a friend a true friend, and when can our friends take us as their true friend. Friendship is the most important relationships we can have. Though all of us have family , most of us rely on friends for advice, comfort and inspiration. How do we define a relation that can be called as one of true friendship?
The very first sign of a very good friend, not necessarily a true friend is that we are not worried about courtesies. You will call your friend at any hour and talk without any thought of time in your mind. Similarly, whenever you need support, you will call a very good friend and ask him/her to help you out. They expect the same from you. Another important trait of such relations is that we are not much worried about exposing ourselves. We speak about everything in our mind without worrying about what our friends will think. We are sure that they will take our talk in the spirit it was made. We are unguarded and open with friends in our talk.
A true friend is a little more than a very good friend. A true friend will support you even if it hurts his/her own interest. A true friend will understand your motives and needs and will be with you without any analysis or criticism. A true friend will come forward to help without any request and be with us in need without showing it or expecting anything in return. With a true friend, you can be sure that you will get help to the extent possible by him/her.
A true friend makes no excuses of having work or appointments or anything but will be with you whenever you need him/her. In your hour of desperation, a true friend will support you even if the whole world opposes you. A true friend is not an opportunist. if you have a true friend, treat yourself lucky.
But irony is that sometimes your really nice and good friend can give you a lesson, even hard lesson !
Everyone wants a true friend, and many of us believe that we have a friend who can be called a true friend. What kind of relations do friends share? When can we call a friend a true friend, and when can our friends take us as their true friend. Friendship is the most important relationships we can have. Though all of us have family , most of us rely on friends for advice, comfort and inspiration. How do we define a relation that can be called as one of true friendship?
The very first sign of a very good friend, not necessarily a true friend is that we are not worried about courtesies. You will call your friend at any hour and talk without any thought of time in your mind. Similarly, whenever you need support, you will call a very good friend and ask him/her to help you out. They expect the same from you. Another important trait of such relations is that we are not much worried about exposing ourselves. We speak about everything in our mind without worrying about what our friends will think. We are sure that they will take our talk in the spirit it was made. We are unguarded and open with friends in our talk.
A true friend is a little more than a very good friend. A true friend will support you even if it hurts his/her own interest. A true friend will understand your motives and needs and will be with you without any analysis or criticism. A true friend will come forward to help without any request and be with us in need without showing it or expecting anything in return. With a true friend, you can be sure that you will get help to the extent possible by him/her.
A true friend makes no excuses of having work or appointments or anything but will be with you whenever you need him/her. In your hour of desperation, a true friend will support you even if the whole world opposes you. A true friend is not an opportunist. if you have a true friend, treat yourself lucky.
But irony is that sometimes your really nice and good friend can give you a lesson, even hard lesson !
Thursday 30 July 2009
Life's crisis & friends
Over the years, I have discovered life is a journey, a pilgrimage, a sacred adventure. Within everyone’s inner solitude, there is that bright and warm hearth where the spirit dwells waiting to be roused.
Each of us from time to time experience crises from different life changing events and transitions, all unpredictable moments arriving and intruding into our “well groomed” lives. We didn’t ask for this interference and we wonder why it has arrived bringing with it havoc and confusion. BUT no matter what the source, each crisis has a common bond…a threshold.
And that threshold can be crossed easily if we have a true , really intimate friend who provide us emotional support throughout this crisis and help us to tide over the troubled period with ease. But that person should be one who has shown uninihibited love towards you and with him/her you can share anything, repeat, anything under this world.
During these times of roadblocks, dead ends and detours, we often choose to ignore serene advice from our loved ones as we become a bit irritant. We tend to bury or ignore them. But this is not good. If you truly love her/him then you must trust her too, bcz you should understand that he/she loves you too and that through their power of love you can gain sufficient strength , they can bestow wisdom and knowledge expanding your vision of life.
Celebrating, mourning or wrestling with a life passage is an extraordinary act. Slow down and be in touch with your feelings and also with your loved ones. Be kind and loving to yourself and to the person you really love. Act from your spirit and heart and don’t forget to be in touch with them.
Each of us from time to time experience crises from different life changing events and transitions, all unpredictable moments arriving and intruding into our “well groomed” lives. We didn’t ask for this interference and we wonder why it has arrived bringing with it havoc and confusion. BUT no matter what the source, each crisis has a common bond…a threshold.
And that threshold can be crossed easily if we have a true , really intimate friend who provide us emotional support throughout this crisis and help us to tide over the troubled period with ease. But that person should be one who has shown uninihibited love towards you and with him/her you can share anything, repeat, anything under this world.
During these times of roadblocks, dead ends and detours, we often choose to ignore serene advice from our loved ones as we become a bit irritant. We tend to bury or ignore them. But this is not good. If you truly love her/him then you must trust her too, bcz you should understand that he/she loves you too and that through their power of love you can gain sufficient strength , they can bestow wisdom and knowledge expanding your vision of life.
Celebrating, mourning or wrestling with a life passage is an extraordinary act. Slow down and be in touch with your feelings and also with your loved ones. Be kind and loving to yourself and to the person you really love. Act from your spirit and heart and don’t forget to be in touch with them.
Tuesday 23 June 2009
How to deal difficult people
Have you ever wondered why some people are difficult to work with?
Individuals behave in a difficult manner because they have learned that doing so keeps others off balance and incapable of effective action. Worst of all, they appear immune to all the usual methods of communication and persuasion designed to convince or help them change their ways
How to Cope
Avoid these “don'ts” when dealing with difficult people:
Don't take difficult people's behavior personally. Their troublesome behavior is habitual and affects most people with whom they come in contact.
Don't fight back or try to beat them at their own games. They have been practicing their skills for a lifetime, and you're an amateur.
Don't try to appease them. Difficult people have an insatiable appetite for more.
Don't try to change them. You can only change your responses to their behavior.
Here's how you can cope effectively with following common types of difficult people.
The Complainer
There's always one person in a office who can never find anything about which to be happy. If he's not complaining about his health or family, he's complaining about his job, the company, or even his superior. Of course, some of her complaints may be legitimate, but the incessant whining is getting on your nerves. Generally, the complainer isn't looking for advice so offering it probably won't do any good. Change the subject whenever the bellyaching begins. Your colleague should get the hint after you do this repeatedly.
The Delegator
In almost every workplace you'll find someone who wants to share his work with his colleagues. I am not talking about those who have a legitimate reason to delegate work to others .I am speaking of those who either can't do all the work they have been given or don't want to do it.. Tell your coworker you have your own work with which to deal.
The Credit Grabber
The credit grabber does not acknowledge any help he receives from others. he accepts all the praise for a successfully completed assignments without mentioning that he didn't do it alone. The first time this happens, consider it a mistake. Mention it to your colleague and ask him to let others know about your participation. If he doesn't, or if this happens again, make sure you let others know about the role you played in getting that project done. Then, unless you are mandated to work with this person, refuse to help out again.
Individuals behave in a difficult manner because they have learned that doing so keeps others off balance and incapable of effective action. Worst of all, they appear immune to all the usual methods of communication and persuasion designed to convince or help them change their ways
How to Cope
Avoid these “don'ts” when dealing with difficult people:
Don't take difficult people's behavior personally. Their troublesome behavior is habitual and affects most people with whom they come in contact.
Don't fight back or try to beat them at their own games. They have been practicing their skills for a lifetime, and you're an amateur.
Don't try to appease them. Difficult people have an insatiable appetite for more.
Don't try to change them. You can only change your responses to their behavior.
Here's how you can cope effectively with following common types of difficult people.
The Complainer
There's always one person in a office who can never find anything about which to be happy. If he's not complaining about his health or family, he's complaining about his job, the company, or even his superior. Of course, some of her complaints may be legitimate, but the incessant whining is getting on your nerves. Generally, the complainer isn't looking for advice so offering it probably won't do any good. Change the subject whenever the bellyaching begins. Your colleague should get the hint after you do this repeatedly.
The Delegator
In almost every workplace you'll find someone who wants to share his work with his colleagues. I am not talking about those who have a legitimate reason to delegate work to others .I am speaking of those who either can't do all the work they have been given or don't want to do it.. Tell your coworker you have your own work with which to deal.
The Credit Grabber
The credit grabber does not acknowledge any help he receives from others. he accepts all the praise for a successfully completed assignments without mentioning that he didn't do it alone. The first time this happens, consider it a mistake. Mention it to your colleague and ask him to let others know about your participation. If he doesn't, or if this happens again, make sure you let others know about the role you played in getting that project done. Then, unless you are mandated to work with this person, refuse to help out again.
Saturday 20 June 2009
How to say no
We say yes to people because it's easy. Learning to say no is like learning anything: it seems really scary at first, but it's so rewarding when you get the hang of it!
The trick to saying no is doing it firmly without sounding rude. You must avoid being wishy-washy. Here are some lines you can practice:
· If someone asks you to take on more responsibility than you need: Sorry, This is not not the kind of work i am supposed to do . You please take care of this.
The trick to saying no is doing it firmly without sounding rude. You must avoid being wishy-washy. Here are some lines you can practice:
· If someone asks you to take on more responsibility than you need: Sorry, This is not not the kind of work i am supposed to do . You please take care of this.
· If he asks you to do something you don't feel comfortable with: This sounds like it would be a great opportunity for somebody, but it's not right for me.
· If somebody tries to push work off on you: Thank you for thinking of me, but I will have to say no. I'm just over-scheduled at this time.
· If somebody tries to push work off on you: Thank you for thinking of me, but I will have to say no. I'm just over-scheduled at this time.
· If somebody tries to overload you with a task: I can't do that because i am already overburdened
· If somebody tries to unload a problem on you: I understand your situation, but sorry I can't help.
Here are some tips:-
1. Listen to the request respectfully. Do not interrupt the speaker.
2. Phrase your "no" as simply as possible. Don't raise your voice or become upset, simply say that you cannot help this time. When you say no, say it in a confident, well modulated voice to sound more straightforward.
3. Don't feel obligated to explain. You have your reasons and they may not be ones you wish to discuss. If this is the case, try saying something like, "I'm just not able to." Leave it at that - if you must, change the subject, or say, "I'm sorry, but I need to go."
4. Explain simply, and only if you wish to do so. If the case really is one that you feel okay explaining, make your explanation as simple as possible.
5. Stand firm. If the requestor does not want to accept your answer, tell him that your mind is made up and that you will not change it.
- When You Have to Say Yes
There will be times when you want to say no but you can’t. A conditional "yes" may be necessary if you know you should do something but you also know you don't have all the time or resources. An example of a conditional yes is: "Yes, I'll do this but rest will have to done by you.
Saying no is all about gaining respect. Gain respect for yourself by saying no when it's necessary. Gain the respect of others by saying no in a polite way.
Thursday 18 June 2009
Importance of taking break from work
It has been worldwide recognised that periodically taking breaks from your work is absolutely necessery for personality development.One feel well-rested, energetic and bursting with new ideas. I strongly believe that taking time off from your job is not only desirable, it's imperative. If all you do is work, what can you possibly bring to your job but more of the same? ... the same perspective on things, the same ideas, the same way of doing things. Spending time away from work allows you to explore other interests which will make you well-rounded. Breaks from work will let you see things with a fresh eye enhancing your creativity and problem-solving skills.
If you begin working early in the morning and don't quit until bedtime, there will be no room in your life to focus on anything but your job. So make sure you take some time for non-work activities at regular intervals in addition to regular vacations. Here's how one can spend some of his time away from work:
· Read a good book (non-work related, of course)
· Keep up with world news, sports etc.
· Travel for pleasure
· Volunteer your time
· Talk to people with whom you feel free and who are really close to your heart
· Enjoy a hobby
· Read a good book (non-work related, of course)
· Keep up with world news, sports etc.
· Travel for pleasure
· Volunteer your time
· Talk to people with whom you feel free and who are really close to your heart
· Enjoy a hobby
All these ideas are great but what to do if a break is forced upon you? I think the same priniple applies here too and that is the best way to cope up with the problems you are facing.
Monday 15 June 2009
Pain of loving
" Pain of loving you....." these are the famous words used by Shri Nirmal verma in one of his novel, perhaps in "Antim aranya". That in real love one is certain to face some pain, particularly if this love is not centric to physical intimacy. i have found the paradox that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.
Loving is a feeling that brings both joy and pain to heart. Joy from being with person one loves , being filled with an emotion so deep and tender that no other feeling can compare. Pain from knowing that he is so in love, that he is more vulnerable than he has been ever
Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. ........... no response from ur loved one and not being able to communicate with her is really paiful.(09.06.09)
Loving is a feeling that brings both joy and pain to heart. Joy from being with person one loves , being filled with an emotion so deep and tender that no other feeling can compare. Pain from knowing that he is so in love, that he is more vulnerable than he has been ever
Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. ........... no response from ur loved one and not being able to communicate with her is really paiful.(09.06.09)
Wednesday 10 June 2009
Loneliness
It is said that loneliness makes the loudest noise. It is, together with the feeling of being unloved , is the ultimate poverty. it is true that we are born alone , we live alone, we die alone. Only thru our love and friendship we can create illusion for the moment that we are not alone.
Language has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone, and it has created the word "Soltitude" to express the glory of being alone.
so the question is that of "positive Thinking" !!!!!!!
Tuesday 9 June 2009
Missing someone close to your heart
Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated. It is said that Love is, missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart. Can miles truly separate you from your friend.... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.
It is true that missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will! It is also true that we only part to meet again.
So one should never be dismayed by good-byes. A farewell is necessary before we can meet again. And meeting again after moments of seperation is certain for those who are friends by heart.....
Sunday 7 June 2009
Ideal Relationship
The most wonderful of all things in life, I believe, is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a glowing depth, beauty, and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident.
So we should Treasure our relationships, not our possessions.